By If you’re unsure what this whole “Holidroid Contest” thing is all about, be prepared to get excited. From November 24th through December 25th, Phandroid is giving away a Kindle Fire every single day along with other great prizes like the Galaxy Nexus Galaxy Tabs, JAMBOX, SmarTouch Gloves, Android Phones, Android T-Shirts, Seidio Vouchers and more. Read our announcement post for details.
Yesterday’s Winner
There are only a few more days in our Holidroid giveaway. We’re still sorting through yesterday’s entries but there are more prizes to be had. No winner will be getting coal for Christmas!
Amazon Kindle Fire
The Kindle Fire could be this holiday’s hottest product: at only $199 it’s not only one of the most affordable Android tablets, it’s also one of the best. That’s a killer combination. With a beautiful UI, great battery life, carefully curated apps/games, and an amazing array of media options thanks to Amazon’s Digital Content Ecosystem… the Kindle Fire is a sure win. Good luck winning one in our contest, but at only $199 it’s probably worth buying one just in case!
Samsung Galaxy Tab 8.9
Everyone seems to be craving Samsung Android devices these days, and for good reason. Samsung makes some of the best hardware out there, coupled with great software integration, and the Galaxy Nexus and Galaxy Tab 8.9 are two great examples of Samsung’s industry leading products. These devices were sponsored directly by Samsung, thanking our readers and forum members for their excitement, interest, and support over the past year. With an 8.9-inch screen, dual core processor, and camera that records in 720p HD, the Galaxy Tab 8.9 is a perfect companion to that Kindle Fire you just snagged.
Isotoner SmarTouch Gloves
Every single holiday season these SmarTouch smartphone gloves are consistently one of my favorite gift giving items. They eloquently solve one of the most fundamental problems a tech lover faces: using your device in cold weather. Wearing gloves usually prevents your touchscreen from working: take your phone out, take your glove off, use your phone, hand gets gold, shove phone in pocket, rush to get glove on. NO MORE! Isotoner’s SmarTouch gloves, designed in my colors and sizes for both men and women, has technology that passes the electrons your body gives off, through the gloves, onto the capacitive screen and allowing it to work. VOILA! Seriously. It works. Trust me. Try it… and you’ll love them forever.
Seidio $30 Voucher
With so much smartphone use comes battery drain. Thankfully, Seidio makes some awesome extended batteries that fit many smartphones, allowing you to get longer battery life with the same device. No more toting around a charger everywhere you go: just snag a Seidio and call it a day! Seidio also makes cases, holsters, and other great accessories for your smartphones.Check them all out here.
ZeeMote Bluetooth Game Controller
The Zeemote Bluetooth Game Controller compacts things into one comfortable, ergonomically sound gaming package. You use one hand and the controller has an analog stick with four action buttons on it. It’s a bit reminiscent of a Nintendo Wiimote – makes you wonder where the name was inspired from. There are many games in the Android Market already compatible with the Zeemote, including the popular title R-Type, and you may even be able to use it with some of your emulators. It goes perfectly with many Android devices, from 3.2 inch phones to 10.1 inch tablets. And if you want the ultimate gaming experience, Zeemote + Phone/Tablet + TV + HDMI-out = awesome.
Jawbone JAMBOX
Ever wanted a small, portable speaker that plays music LOUD and CLEAR and isn’t a pain to setup? Let me introduce you to the Jawbone JAMBOX speaker. This bad boy packs a powerful bunch an extremely small frame, easily connects to your Android device via Bluetooth, and is an absolute pleasure to use. Bluetooth means you can stream not only music, but also games, apps, phone conversations, movies, and any other audio playing on your device! It also means no cords! Put it on your desk. Carry it to the kitchen. Bring it to the basketball court. Take it to your friend’s party. The Jawbone JAMBOX is a music lover’s dream device.
Today’s Contest Rules/Regulations:
I know it seems like we have taken his job with all the free stuff we have been giving away lately, but in just a few days Santa Claus will be squeezing himself down the chimney and dropping off some goodies for all the well-behaved children of the world. Then there is this kid. For today’s caption challenge we’d like a good reason for this not so cheerful child on Santa’s lap.
- You have until the end of the day to compose the most clever/funny/witty caption for the above picture (11:59pm Eastern)
- Submit your caption as a comment below this article (one entry per person… only your first comment counts)
- The best caption as chosen by Phandroid staff wins the day’s prize pack
- Read our Full Official Rules for information about eligibility
- This isn’t required but if you want to be nice… Visit Amazon.com by clicking here before you do your holiday shopping because you love us!
Looking for a great gift? Don’t forget about our Holiday Gift Guide!
Tomorrow’s Contest:
We’ll be giving away a Kindle Fire, Smartouch Gloves, $30 Seidio Voucher, Galaxy Nexus, and ZeeMote! You never know when we’ll make our contest post so check back early and often!
“I WANTED A GALAXY NEXUS NOT A IPHONE!! AHH!!!
MOOOOOM…..something’s poking me!!!!!
Yeah, that’s not going to win a contest….ump :-|
Well you beat me to the punch on that one. For the record I commented before reading through what was here.
How about “Mommy, it’s the scary guy who hangs around school asking for directions!” I know the same sentiment, but a little more subtle. I guess it’s Santa’s eyes that make me go there. He’s just got that look like in a few years he’s gonna be on a rooftop with a sniper rifle.
Gurl bye
But Santa I don’t want an iPhone 4S for Christmas…. I want the Samsung Galaxy Nexus.
Reaction when Jimmy was told by Santa that he refused to get him a Galaxy Nexus for Christmas and instead would be getting him an iPhone.
“I don’t WANT an IPhone! I want a Galaxy Nexus! Phandroid PROMISED me A Galaxy Nexus!”
Santa: Ho Ho Ho, what do you want for christmas?
Child: A AWESOME Galaxy nexus!!!
Someone in the crowd: Grow up kid he aint real!!!
Child: What!!!!!!!!!! He’s not real!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa*
Santa: Shhhh here is your Galaxy Nexus, now get out I have cookies to eat.
calm down kid, it was a joke. Michael Jackson is not really one of my elves.
Santa says, “I am sorry kid, they are delaying the release of that phone.”
“Mom! Don’t you get it? I already got my Galaxy Nexus! I don’t CARE about Santa anymore!”
Mommy said he couldn’t have an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle!
Parents of child: “We thought she was crying because of the smell of her dirty diaper, but apparently the smell was coming from Santa. I guess that’s why he had his legs closed so tightly.”
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS MY SOUL BACK!
“What? Ice Cream Sandwich? You’ll get diabeetus, kid. How about a football?”
Santa informs little Timmy that no matter how good he is there still isn’t a Galaxy Nexus for Sprint.
WHAT? No Transformer Prime for Christmas!?!? You might as well tell me you’re not really Santa!
You can’t have a Galaxy Nexus. You’ll poke your eyes out.
“Mr. Claus, we caught this one trying to escape the workshop.”
“AT&T chairman reacts to the collapse of T-Mobile merger deal. Santa looks on indifferently.”
“Sonny, you’re getting a phone on AT&T’s network this Christmas”
Santa: “Shut up kid your getting an iPhone s!”
“I said I wanted to see GRANDPA, not this guy!!!!!!!”
(Below is my son’s fist time seeing Santa 2 weeks ago, lol)
hahaha, I have pics like that of all three of my kids.
Lol, he’s only one, but he is getting better at accepting Santa after seeing 2 more after this one…
Don’t look at me like that! How am I supposed to know this is actually a little boy? His name is Stacy and he asked for Barbie’s Dream House!
Mom! I don’t think that’s a Galaxy Nexus in his pocket!!!
“He’s a fake! Everyone run!”
(Child Crying) Mommy, Santa said that Steve Jobs is my real daddy!!!!!! He’s evil, Waaaaaahhhhhh.
Once upon a time, Santa Said, “Ho Ho Ho, what do you want for Christmas?”
And the kid replied, “I want a cookie.” Then Santa replied, “Too bad. Your supposed to give cookies to ME. ME and only ME.” Kid starts crying, “#&*^#@*%@(%@)#%&)(#%&#@%)&#(@%&#*@)(%&#*@%&#*@) SANTA.”
“I’d cry too if I had to wear that outfit, kid”
“That’s not a Nexus in your pocket!!!”
Santa told me to get an iphone 4 when i want a galaxy nexus NOW!! NOW!! NOW!!!
A tribute to the hairy 80’s…
“Santa’s bushy, ungroomed beard reminded young Jimmy of his first hair-choked breath upon exiting the womb. His reaction was much the same as well.”
By sitting on my lap you have signed a 2 year agreement with AT&T.
Seriously,dude, all I told her was that I couldn’t give her the official Ice Cream Sandwich update for her device until the 2nd Quarter of 2012 and she was all “Waaaahhhh!” No need to be a baby about it….geez…
It was at that moment that Rob Dyrdek knew he needed to switch careers, That Christmas no one got toys, except for Rob who got a skateboard.
“Noooooooooo!!!! Let me go play with my Galaxy Nexus while it’s still relevant!”
Kid: I want a Red Ryder BB gun.. Santa: but you’ll poke your eye out, kid! how about a football Kid: WAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAaahhhhhhhhhhhh
“We drove two hours to the mall, stood in line for forty-five minutes for Timmy to see Santa, took thirty pictures of them, and sadly, THIS was the best one.”
Let me go! This app tells me you are a child molester dressed as Santa Claus.
“You can’t hold me back. I WILL beat Apple in these patent wars!”
I said an Ice Cream sandwich, you gave me an galaxy nexus. NOW I SCREAM.
Santa: Ho ho ho, what do you want for Christmas, little girl…a Barbie?
Kid: I’m a boy and I want a Verizon Samsung Galaxy Nexus LTE with an HDMI dock and unlimited data plan.
Santa: …you’ll shoot your eye out, kid.
Santa whispers: “Apple is suing that you’re their Intellectual Property… you’re a fanboy now.”
“I don’t want Carrier IQ on my smarty pants phone! I want Angry Birds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANGRY BIRDS!!!!!!!!!! ANGRY BIRDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Santa: “Steve Jobs’s saint-like persona is even more of a myth than Santa Clause… and I refuse to let apple try and distory Android!”
Apple Fan-Boy Kid: “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO”
Law & Order: North Pole Unit
“RAPE!! Something is poking my leg!!!”
Liar!!!!!! You said two inches only and I would get a Nexus!!!!
Mommy, this Santa has NO PRESENTS! MOMMY, why are you leaving? Santa won’t let me go. NO I DON’T WANT TO BE AN ELF!!!!! NooooOOOooooOOOoooOOO!
http://oi42.tinypic.com/167v7sw.jpg
LOL I thought of the same thing.. that’s so funny!! didn’t realize you wrote something about it…. oopsss this didn’t post where it was supposed to….my bad.. this was in respond to Tim Kirby’s post :)
Give me your galaxy nexus or I’ll steal your kid lady!
Santa: “Listen kid, if you don’t sit here and smile for this damn photo, I’m gonna make sure that you only get presents from the Apple store from now on!”
someone didnt get a galaxy nexus…
Jerry Sandusky as Santa at the annual Christmas party.
Holy crap! :)
If you’re quiet, kid, I’ve got an ice cream sandwich for you in the back
“I wanted a Nexus on ANY carrier OTHER than Verizon, not even SANTA can grant that!”
The ghost of Steve Jobs returns and impersonates Santa Claus to give children iPhones. The children do not approve.
“Get off of me! That beard doesn’t fool me! I’m not going to build iPad 3’s for you Steve!!!!!”
“All I want for Christmas is for daddy to stop talking about his ice cream sandwich. :(“
“I said NO SPRINKLES!!!”
Deciding the child was naughty this year, Pro Wrestler wannabe Bruno Santarino practices hammer- and leg-lock holds as the child screams for mercy.
Don’t you dare take another picture of me in these pants!!!
“If I let you go, do you promise to leave my Gnexus alone?’
kid: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
“And tomorrow we’re going to do the same thing at Penn State!”
No SANTA! I want an ANDROID!!!
I can feel Santa’s iPhone vibrating!!!!
MOM…… Santa just told me I couldn’t have my Galaxy S Honeycomb update until next year, DAMN FRAGMENTATION!
Santa: “You think I’m kidding, but if I don’t get a Samsung Galaxy Tab 8.9, I am going to pull this kid’s arms off!!!”
“NOOOOO!!!!!!! I DON’T WANT TO GO TO CHINA AND BUILD iPHONES!!!!”
“HE POKED ME!”
Santa: If you touch my Gnexus again, I will eat you…
kid: Mamiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And what do you want for Christmas little girl. All I want is a Samsung Galaxy Tab. Honey, I’m sorry to tell you but the Galaxy Tab has been banned??…bbbbbanned?HHOOWW…NNOOOOOO!!!!!!!….I hate you Apple!!!!!
Sorry Billy, your LeapFrog tablet will not be getting an Ice Cream Sandwich upgrade.
Santa: “Sorry, the galaxy nexus is backordered. Amazon says “Usually ships in 1 to 3 weeks,” which is too late to get it on the slay for Christmas eve.”
Robo Santa with kung-fu death grip: the true origin of young Steve Jobs hatred of all things android.
Ho Ho Ho and as you pull his arms apart his mouth will close
I DON’T WANT A BLACKBERRY!!!
Sanata: HO HO HO! MERRRY CHRIST **i’m gonna rip your arms off** TMAAAAAAS!!!
Kid: WAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Santa: WHAT WHAT? What did I say??
Santa: iPhone or Nexus
Kid: Nexus
Santa: Sorry the we just gave that kid the last one
CLICK
The Iphone 4S only has 3g?!?!?! NO!!!!!!
I don’t care how much these tiered data plans are costing me, this Santa job is so very not worth it.
“Moooommmy, this man told me Andy the Android isn’t real!!”
Santa: I was going to make her laugh…. until I took an arrow to the knee…
“But Santa, I thought you said Nexus phones weren’t going to be sold as carrier-exclusive devices!”
AHHHHHHHHHH Apple just patented the act of walking! Save us Santa!
“Santa’s all out of the Galaxy Nexus, son. How about an iPhone 4s?”
Apple has a patent for Santa, NOOOOO!!!!
This is a famous picture, because it’s last time Steve Wozniak ever had to “ask” for a tech gift.
A young Steve Jobs spots another child with a yellowish shirt on. In a fit of rage he promises to destroy that child and sue his pants off (which are much better looking than his).
CUPERTINO, Calif.-An Apple-sponsored Christmas party goes sour, as Santa holds down a seven-year old and forces him to watch an iPhone 4S promotional video. The child tried violently to escape. Immediately after this photo was taken, Santa was seen grimacing in great pain.
Ho Ho Home Invasion…
STRANGER DANGER!
B-)
“WHAT DO YOU MY NEW PHONE WON’T GET ICE CREAM SANDWICH?!?”
“Help, Mommy: He smells like an Apple patent lawyer!”
“You got me an IPhone!? I wanted a Galaxy Nexus!!”
Little Lyndsay’s smile turned to rage as Santa whispered in her ear,
“Don’t worry I’ll get you that Windows Phone 7 you’ve been wanting…”
Later she was seen leaving the mall lobby yelling that the Santa was a
fraud and in fact was Steve Balmer.
Santa: “So what would you like for Christmas this year?”
Child: “I want to get a brand new Galaxy Tablet for Christmas!”
Santa: “I’m sorry little child, but my workshop and elves do not know how to make microprocessors, lcd screens, and memory cards. Have you tried to win one from Phandroid.com?”
Child: “NOOOOO! You were my last chance Santa! WYAAAAA!”
Superchunk learning he posted to much info! ;-)
Lol IKR
Ouch…
lol, yes, yes I did.
Glad to see you are a good sport. I almost didn’t post because I didn’t want to offend you.
I like to think I’m always a good sport. I only made a lot of noise because I wanted to win. Who wouldn’t have? I’m grateful for the 2nd chance and the $25 gift card…. and you’re quote is pretty funny. Wish I’d thought of it.
Lol yeah, if you thought of it, you might have won again for real! (If they’d let you win twice)
I felt the same way when I lost 2nd on the Secret Phrase challenge, so I tried to make a lot of “noise” as well. Who wouldn’t right?
Anyways congrats on the 25$ giftcard, you win something for the holidays :)
Apple, I do not want an apple anything. I want a android driven Nexus and I want it now. MOOOMMMMMMM! Help , stranger danger!!! Arggghh
Ahhh Ben Affleck is humping my leg……
What do you mean Santa works for APPLE???
“Im sorry, but due to pending lawsuits Santa can only give out ipads this year”
I am not a sheep!! I wanted the Galaxy Tab! You can take your iPad and rot in Hell with that Jobs guy
Santa is Verizon (BIG RED LOL) – The kid is the customer.
“Don’t cry buddy… even though I’m taking away your unlimited data! You can still double your data at an incredibly low rate, its an even deal!!!”
Pictures just aren’t the same ever since Apple won the patent rights for smiling.
“how about a nice flip phone or a slider?”
“I want android! wahhhhh!”
“Mommy I feel something HARDDD, santa just give me my nexus k thanks”
Santa was left with no choice but to break the news when she asked for a Droid 4
::WAHH WAHH:: All I wanted for Christmas was an Ice Cream Sandwich, but instead I got a Galaxy Nexus with a borked radio!!! ::WAHH WAHH::
“AHHH!! I said I wanted a PHONE on a big red network.. not a bone from a big red pervert!”
“Two part answer, kid. NO, I won’t bring Steve Jobs back to life, and why is your request as androgynous as your appearance!?! PLEASE, ask for something normal next year!”
Santa ‘OK, kid, I know the little green android has cooler stuff than me, but I promise you I AM the real Santa Claus’
Santa: What would you like for Christmas, little girl?
Little Girl: I want a Kindle Fire, Samsung Galaxy Tab 8.9, Isotoner SmarTouch Gloves, Seido Giftcard, Zeemote Controler, Jawbone Jambox….
Santa: Hang on there…who do you think I am? Phandroid? You’ll get a new doll, and like it.
Little Girl: NNNNNOOOOO
See image. :)
Jimmy learns that Santa can’t get him unlimited data.
“Do you see what that Forever 31 skank-pants stylist did to my hair? Hold me back, Santa… Hold me back!”
You swear I can keep him? Ill call u candy corn
“But Siri said you’re real!”
“Yeah I bet the bitch told you the iPhone is better than the Galaxy Nexus also”
Boy: I want an Iphone 5 NOWWW!
Santa: You’ll get an galaxy nexus and you’ll like it boy….
…and it was then that little Jimmy realized that there was no longer
any hope for humanity for the creature that killed his mom and dad so
many years before had found a new home. A home where it could always find fresh meat willing to come to it. Jimmy let out his final cry as the Sysyphyx had found its ultimate form, a beard on a beloved figure.. No longer would the shape-shifting scourge of Atlantis need to hide in shadows the children would come to him and they to would be rend of flesh and life…
I may have just ruined christmas for my own kids…
While Santa was very relieved that the Galaxy Nexus did make it in time for Christmas, he nonetheless faced a long day at the mall with those kids who were hoping for a Droid 4 this year.
“Little Billy was distraught to find out that Apple’s lawsuits have prevented Santa from giving away any Android phones or tablets.”
Santas holding me against my will. He stole all of the cookies. He has a fake beard and stinks. My mom dressed me weird. And who did the design here? This must have been Apples doing… Apple- keeps everyone locked. Takes all of the fun from a phone blocking apps. Steals ideas from others and patents them as theirs. Keeps the same design for multiple generations. This Christmas with Santa is horrid I am furious time to go get my NEXUS!
Santa:What do you want for Christmas little girl?
Kid:I want a….
Santa:Hurry up kid, we don’t have all day here.
Kid:I want a….
Santa:Since you can’t spit it out, you’re getting a football
Kid: But I wanted a Kindle Fire.
Santa:Shut up kid, you are wet, smell like poop, and I am not real, you parents are to poor to get you something like that.
“I’m sorry Billy I already gave away all my Galaxy Nexus s2’s”. All I have left
are these iphone 4se’s Ho Ho Ho!, seems nobody wanted them”. “Momeee I want a
Galaxy Nexus S2 Waaaaaaah! Waaaah! Waaaah!”
Just kidding! We’re taking your Galaxy Nexus back and giving you an iPhone 3!!!
With the impending 1987 budget cuts, Penn State is proud to announce that Assistant Football Coach Jerry Sandusky has volunteered to be Santa Claus for our holiday football camp for at-risk youth. He is such a giving and caring person. Thanks, Jerry.
“Why can’t I have Chris Chavez’s hair?!?!”
Santa: Ugh, how many of these brats do I have to put up with before I can afford a Galaxy Nexus…
“What, you have Galaxy Nexus? Hold on sonny. Do you wanna trade with my iPhone? Ho ho ho. No, I won’t let you go until you trade.”
But I don’t want an iPad! I want an amethyst gray, 32GB ASUS Transformer Prime with 10.1-inch WXGA Super IPS+ Capacitive Multi Touch Display, 1.2MP front camera and 8MP auto-focus rear camera, NVIDIA Tegra 3 Mobile Processor, 1GB DDR2 Memory, and Ice Cream Sandwich!
Santa just told Billie that the Phandroid.com Holidroid contest only had 3 days left. Billie could only think of 1 way to react because he had spent so many days hitting F5 trying to find the darn secret image and now his chances are about to run out!
But I wanted an ice cream sandwich nexus phone on ALL carriers by Christmas!
Kris Kringle: Making ugly kids cry since 0 A.D.
And Steve Jobs had his first vision of his future Android nemesis
ICE CREAM SAMMICH!!!!!!
The Guy in the Santa suit thinks to himself “Just a few more days of this, and then I’ll finally be able to import my Galaxy Nexus (for Tmobile)!”
“I don’t want to be in a Tim Allen movie!!!”
The only time in history where Santa was the one who peed on the kid sitting on his lap.
Kid: IT’s NOT a NEXUS!!!! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!
And So It Begins: Santa restrains little Stevie Jobs moments before now former playground mate little Andy Rubin leaps in and punches him in the gut.
your not the real santa….
Sorry kid your dad caught me kissing your mom. So no presents for you this year sport!
Santa: “Gimme the Galaxy Tab or else I inject this boy with 23 chromosomes.”
Kid: 23! I HATE ODD NUMBERS!
When Santa runs out of Ice Cream Sandwiches.
“This child has two large bottom canines like an orc. You can no longer unsee this. Merry Christmas.”
“Not an iPhone! NOOOOO!”
Little Girl: “Mommy! Help me! I told you the boogeyman was real!”
Mom: “That’s not the boogeyman, that’s Santa Clause”
Little Girl: “Then what was he doing under my bed last night!?”
Santa: “I can explain?”
“WTF!!!!!!”
“What do you mean, I’m getting my ice cream sandwich ‘at a future date?’ I want it NOW!!!!!!!”
No! I hate multi-touch!
What do you mean no transformer prime for Christmas.
Kid looks on in terror as her mom is taken off by security after she attacked Santa because he never called after her “time spent” with him on Christmas Eve 3 years ago. Santa assures onlookers that he raise the kid as his own…wait…damnit…this is my kid!
“A Galaxy Nexus? Sorry kid, you’ll shoot your eye out! How bout a nice iPhone 4S instead? HO HO HO!”
What do you mean Santa doesn’t have any Asus Transformer Prime’s either?!
“He said Android stole slide down notifications from the iPhone!”
Santa mumbles under beard: “Shut it up kid! I hate this too. I am just doing this job to save up and buy an unlocked galaxy nexus.”
Even at an early age, Steve Jobs yearned the destruction of open-source ideology, like Santa. Jobs was known to run around, yelling: “You’re my Santa, I will update you once a year and everyone will pay dearly for that update”.
Young Cindy Florence was rendered helpless to her emotions when Santa informed her that children on the naughty list would be receiving an iPhone because the north pole had run out of coal. It was only then, as he saw the ghost of Steve Jobs laughing maniacally in the distance, that Mr. Claus realized the evil plan of Apple Inc.
This guys a fake!!!!!!! He has no glasses!!! Help!!!!!
I asked for a Galaxy Nexus but Santa said all he can give me is a stupid iphone because Apple has a patent on Christmas Wishes……. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
I don’t want to be a hipster when I grow up…… Waaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!
Ever wonder if a closer shave would have improved your day?
Sure you can have a galaxy but your are doesn’t have LTE data yet so all you’ll get is 3G speeds and horrible battery life
You listen to me kid, you’ll get an iPhone and you’ll be happy about it.
viperdrifta [AT] gmail.com
MOMMY!!!!! SANTA SAID HES GETTING ME AN IPHONE and not a Galaxy Nexus, and he made fun of my pants!
But Santa, I don’t want an iPhone! I want a Galaxy Nexus! I’m creative!
Dude, your student of the month…
Merry Christmas from the Sanduskys
This is what happens when Santa tells the kids he is now employed by Apple and wont’ be giving out and Android devices this year.
Santa: How about a LeapFrog LeapPad?
Kid: Are you kidding me? Only a 480×272 5″ inch screen and only 2GB on-board memory? That’s kid’s stuff. What else you got?
Santa: How about an iPad 2?
Kid: I’d rather have a lump of coal than an apple. Let’s get serious, how about an Asus Transformer Prime.
Santa: Elves stopped making them; Hasbro is suing us for copyright infringement.
Kid: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Assistant Coach Jerry Sandusky volunteering as a local mall Santa.
lol…you took mine!!! Nice job!
damn that was going to be mine too!
HAHAHAHAHAH!
Santa: “So you just tug here and here on this toy boy and the arms are supposed to come off?”
Kid: “Noooo, I’m Jewish!”
Moooooooom. I saw him on the sex offender registry last week!
Santa: Do you want Justin Bieber for christmas?
Kid: *starts crying*
The reason why the kid is upset:
Kid: What do you mean my parents aren’t real??
Santa: You see how it feels?…..not so nice, is it…
Apology accepted……….Captain Needa.
“No, those are not apples on my pants, their little androids!!! Now let me GOOOOO!!!”
No, Santa, I meant an ASUS Transformer Prime!
“I swear…if anyone ever posts this picture online…prizes will be had…or asses will be kicked!!”
Kid: Santa, is that an android in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Santa: No kid, its an Iphone 5 prototype my elves “found”
Kid: NOOOOOOOOOO!
“But I swear you won’t even notice the difference between 3G and 4G!”
“Help! You’re not Santa! Let me go! Santa’s over there wearing the red shirt in the Verizon store and giving people Android phones!”
Santa: “Don’t cry sport, only 89 more minutes of pressing F5 so I can win the Phandroid.com contest today. You can have the ZeeMote, but I’m keeping the Isotoners!”
“Look kid. I’d scream too if my parents dressed me like that.”
LET ME GO SANTA!!!! That girl touched my Galaxy Nexus. I don’t care if it was my MOM SANTA! MINE MINE MINE. She can ask you for her own.
And Santa, Please give me a Phandroid Prize Package also.
Food’s running low at the North Pole because of the recession. All those elves need to eat alot to work on those toys. To keep them motivated we had to use Rudolph for “Reindeer Steak Night”.
Mom!!! Help!! Its Michael Jackson’s Ghost!!..lol!
Look kid, Just because I’m old and have white hair doesn’t mean I’m a catholic priest!
kid: All I wanted for Christmas was a galaxy nexus with Google wallet and an unlocked boot loader. Why you do it big red, Why?
Your going to take a iphone 4s and your going to like it kid! Now sit down and shut up!
Child: I Would like a Galaxy Nexus Pwease!!…Wait… Aren’t you Paul Rudd?!..
Paul: Tough times kid, tough times…. =(.
What’s that? You don’t like your Nexus? You want an iPhone?
You’re adopted and your parents are getting a divorce.
Someone just found out that they are getting a flip phone.
Santa tells kid that Verizon lied about the Signal fix coming to the Galaxy Nexus.
Child: I want the Samsung Galaxy Tab 8.9 with dual core processor, Honeycomb and the Android Market NOWWWWW OR I’M GONNA TEAR THIS PLACE APART!!!!!
Santa: Siri, help, how can my elves make a Galaxy Tab?
Siri: Dammit Santa! I’m only as smart as my makers. I’m a program not a miracle worker! How about an Ipad?
Child: AAAAAGGGGGHHH!!
Santa: Security!!
Santa: How about an iPhone for christmas little girl.
Girl: Arrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. No i want Ice cream sandwhich not a damn apple you idiot.
Who’s been good and who’s been bad? Santa decides to use Carrier IQ.
“WHAT?!?!?!? No Transformer Prime?”
What every kid has to learn eventually, Santa’s year around job? A dentist. And? He keeps all the money you get when you put those teeth you lost under your pillow. All those toys you want at Christmas, don’t come cheaply.
Santa: “Hate to say it, kid, but 12 years from now, your parents are going to show this picture to your prom date.”
Kid: “Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”
Little Timmy went berzerk when he found out Christmas and his Galaxy Nexus had been delayed again to a future, yet to be determined, date. Santa deferred all comments regarding product and carrier availability to Cupid and the Easter Bunny.
Little Kid: Santa….what is that poking me??
Santa: Oh that’s just my iPhone, my dear.
“Let me go! I saw you leaving mommy’s bedroom, and I’m telling my dad!”
(I’m not insinuating anything sinister, here… I’m assuming that Santa is actually this kid’s dad and he doesn’t realize it.)
“I know I smell of alcohol and doritos, but give me a break, your diaper is full now that you know Santas doesn’t like milk and cookies! “
BUT I DON’T WANT A ZUNE!!!
Whattya mean my iphones not 4G?
Dang it Santa, I asked for a new android SMART phone. Not a freaking iphone POS!!!!!!
santa:…..uh guys i think this kid just pinched a grumpy on my leg…..
shim: Screw u guys im goin hoooome, and wheres my ehfing cheesy poofs!!!!
…And I want a Galaxy player, wait you aren’t Santa you’re… JUSTIN BEIBER AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dear Santa i really wish you would quit restraining me both my arm’s hurt really bad. Thank you Santa and you have some poop in your beard.
Holy crap! Santa has bad breath.
Mike Lazaridis as Santa: Little boy, tell all your friends they should ask for Blackberries for Xmas.
I wish I was taller.
For the record, this is a Seinfeld reference. I’m sorry but I can’t resist using it when asked for a caption. Happy Hanukah and Merry Christmas to all.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I SAID DROID 4! NOT iPHONE 4
WHAT? It was delayed til Feb?
YOU ARE THE WORST
F***ING SANTA EVER!
Sorry kid, but apple won their case in the north pole. We can only deliver IPhones this Christmas.
Look kid I don’t have any toys for you! I was kinda hoping that your mom would sit on my lap but instead I got you…
Let’s just make the best of it, cause it looks like neither of us is getting what we want for Christmas…
No, no… get your leg outta there kid, that gift was for your Mom!!!
I’m sorry little guy, I thought you were old enough to learn that the iPhone is just make-believe… no matter what anybody else says, it’s not a ‘real’ smartphone.
I’m Chuck Norris’s what????
To think I’ve wasted all these years writing letters to you I could’ve saved the money on paper and bought a galaxy nexus! FFFFUUUUUU!
“Why didn’t you buy me an unlimited data plan! Now I can’t facebook my twitter while I hashtag my google plus!”
Santa shouldn’t have mentioned he was Team Edward …
I’d be upset too. It looks like Santa’s either hiding a boner or holding the kid hostage.
Your mom is hot kid…now scream so she comes over here and I can get a better look.
Nooooo! don’t pee on my leg, my Nexus is in that pocket.
“What’s that smell? I think this kid just pooped on me”
Yes, I may be a white guy with an extravagant costume and white gloves holding a reluctant little boy, but I am NOT Michael Jackson!
Santa: “So I got you an iPho―”
Child: “WUT DO?!!” *starts crying*
Santa: “Huehuehue”
Look kid, I’m not the real Santa so stop your crying. I’m sure the real Santa will get you a new pair of pants and shirt instead of the kindle fire you asked for.
All you have are iPhones?! Waahhhhh!
Santa: I think this kid just peed on my leg… I don’t get paid enough for this.
Kid: Actually it was diarrhea.
Santa: I quit.
Listen kid! Don’t get all bent outta shape with me cause your mom dressed you in a baby spitup yellow shirt and blocked your access to phandroid.com. I’m Santa, and it’s Christmas for crying out loud. Cut me some slack here… Sheesh, you want a Kindle Fire or not?
Noooooo! i don’t want a Ipad don’t you know I read Phandroid I want a
Galaxy Nexus
Chris Farley – the early years.
Santa: I’m sorry, my little Apple fanboy, but it looks like the judge in Germany is going to lift the ban on Samsung Galaxy Tab after their design change and it is going to crush the iPad2 in sales.
Geeze kid, I said you’ll shoot your eye out with that Red Ryder carbine-action two-hundred shot range model air rifle. Won’t you settle for a brand new Android phone instead?
“CAN … YOU … HEAR … ME … NOW, MR. BIG RED?”
“I don’t care what everyone else wants, I’d rather have the actual ice cream sandwich.”
The things you have to do to get a scholarship at Penn State.
Santa : “Ho Ho Ho! I know you got a tablet instead of a robot, but don’t cry. Santa and Hasbro are working on that right now.”
Sorry kid, but apple won their court case at the north pole. We are only delivering IPhones for Christmas.
They should mount a display behind the photographer with the Android mascot… Happiest kid ever and a perfect picture for all the relatives.
I’m Chuck Norris’s what????
The thing you have to do, to get a scholarship at Penn State.
Santa- “A Kindle Fire, Galaxy Tab, Isotoner Smartouch Gloves, Seido $30 Voucher, ZeeMote Bluetooth Game Controller, AND a Jawbone Jambox? My goodness, kid! Who do you think I am, Phandroid.com?
The white on your clothes doesn’t match the background!
oh, so the Transformer Prime won’t make it me by Christmas this year Santa? Watch what happens when I scream bloody murder and get it on film. You’ll wish you were on the wrong end of an Apple IP lawsuit by the time I’m done with you Fat Man.
Jerry Sandusky might not have been the best Santa, but he accepted no pay. He said, he did it for the love of the children.
I saw Santa Claus, but then I took an arrow to the knee.
” *waaa* Santa smells like apple! *waaaa* “
Santa: I have to give out the toys to the other children, so I cannot make your wish come true.
Steve: :-(
Santa: I can make you CEO of a company though.
Steve: Thank you, Santa. Can you not wear white trims from now, I like that color!
Santa: Oh Oh Ohhh.
You’ll shoot your eye out kid!
I can’t get a Samsung, I’m CREATIVE!
NO NEXUS ON TMOBILE, ATT, OR SPRINT!
“COME ON!”
~GOB, Arrested Development
“Hey Kid, the Droid 4 was pushed to Febuary and it WON’T be sporting the Tegra 3.”
“AAARRRGGGHHHH”
I’m sorry son, the elves tiny hands cannot keep up with the transformer prime requests. how about an optimus prime?
“Mommy!!! Santa said he’s not going to buy me a galaxy nexus!!!”
Mom:” Honey… I have no idea what your talking about…besides I already got you an Atari with Pong!”
Kid:” WHAAaaaaaaaa!!!!!!”
What do you mean Apple patented Ice Scream Sandwiches! I want Ice Cream, I want Ice Cream!
“I told you kid, I don’t think the Prime will get to you by Christmas”
Santa: “I am not real….But you had better sit here, and act like I am…Hold Still!!! Ready….Smile!!”
But I don’t want to sit on Santa Sandusky’s lap!
Anyway for those who have no I idea what I am talking about, first off shame on you and second go to http://bit.ly/rHFG8r to see “A Christmas Story” on the Market.
MOM!!! His hat says “Penn State” on the back!!!
In America, we leave milk and cookies for Santa. In Canada, they leave something very different……
Sorry kid I know I promised you a Galaxy Nexus for Christmas but Verizon has delayed the release again.
I don’t care what Hanukkah Harry told you!!! I want a Red Ryder BB gun!!!
Few people every get to see Santa’s “Naughty List” line in the back rooms at the Mall.
For the first time, we’ll show you this hidden and vile world, but first be forewarned, this is not for the faint of heart. This is no “Night Before Christmas,” tale. That’s why we call this….. “Apples for Christmas.”
Although these children have done much over the year to be placed on the Naughty List, the punishment should fit the crime. A lump of coal in their stocking, maybe leave out the batteries for a new toy, or Captain Kirk and Spock figures to go with the Millennium Falcon, but what we’re about to show you proves there is such a thing as cruel and unusual punishment.
These unhappy children are forced to set on Santa’s lap and watch all the good boys and girl of Phandroid.com play with their android phones. And as if that was not inhuman enough, worst of all… Apple has an exclusive deal so all the children on the Naught List–these poor souls—are forced to sign 4 years contracts for iphones… And now you know the dirty little secret on how Apple has been able to sell so many iphones. Santa, how could you!!!!
The horror….4 years with iphone!!!! Please, please, please, we pled to all you good boys and girls of Phandroid.com, DO NOT BE NAUGHTY!!! You’ve already experienced the joys of android. The pain of having an iphone would be far too great for any sane person to handle.
Happy Holidays.
Thought about making this into an e-book?
“Mom, Dad I swear I am in no way affiliated with Penn State football or Syracuse basketball!”
Dude ease up on my foot sheesh
Aww I think she just peed on my leg………sigh……..I’m gonna need some more egg nog.
AND DON’T BE STINGY WITH THE BRANDY THIS TIME!!
“I’m sorry kid. Apple has filed an injunction against me for being “magical”. Things are looking bad for the Easter Bunny too…”
(A child’s response when Santa told him what Apple wanted for Christmas)
Santa whispers “You were a naughty boy this year, I’m gonna twist your arms and put your leg in a judo ninja death grip ” boy screams “not again” =)
Santa is so numb
to screaming children that he doesn’t realize he is pulling this kid’s arms off
while he is checking out the Hot Mom that is next in line.
If Santa had the same morals which Apple has towards competition: “Wow kid, your mom looks good enough to eat”
“Mom, Dad, don’t you know who this is?! He’s a total CREEPER!! He knows when I’m sleeping and he knows when I’m awake! Get me AWAY!!!”
I’m sorry kid, the manner in which you are opening your mouth to scream has been patented by Apple so you have to surrender your Christmas presents for the rest of your life as restitution, it’s the law!
But mom, I only asked for the red rider single pump action B2B rifle and Santa told me I’d shoot my eye out! Then he told me that I’d look cute dressed as one of his elves and patted my bottom!
I’m sorry kid, Santa keeps all of the Nexus devices for himself.
Girl: I want an Asus Trasnformer Prime for Christmas
Steve Jobs disguised as Santa: Hohoho, of course you can have an Apple iPad for Christmas!
Girl: NO! I WANT AN ASUS TRANSFORMER PRIME!
SJ Santa: HOhoho, have a Merry Christmas with your new iPad!
Girl: NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Santa: What do you want for Christmas?
Child: I I I I want an I I Iphone.
Santa: Next.
Child: Waaaaaaaaaait I mean a Galaxy Nexus with ICS.
Santa: Your gonna get fat.
Hey, check it out…when I rev its arms like a motorcycle, it sounds like a Harley with a baby caught in the exhaust.
Santa: What would you like for Christmas?
Kid: Ice cream sandwich.
Santa: Its the holidays how about some gingerbread instead.
Kid: Whaaaat!
“Mommy, why did he ask me if I wanted an IPhone? I want an Android!”
“Look, you spoiled little brat! I already told you that you haven’t been good enough this year for an Android phone! Now if you don’t stop crying and get off my lap, I will stick that crappy iPhone of yours right up your @$$!”
NOT AGAIN!!! Santa’s diaper is wetter than mine!
SYMBIAN!?! SYMBIAN!?! DO I LOOK LIKE A CAVEMAN?!
Santa: “They just don’t make these Stretch Armstrong dolls as flexible as they used to.”
Jerry Santa-dusky.
“It has MotoBlur.”
“Lighten up, kid, it’s only a Bieber song…”
‘Motorola Razr Maxx NOOOOOOOOOOOOO’
Santa can’t help but consider his immediate need for a huge sling-shot as he notices a tower of stacked Christmas gifts at the other end of the mall …
Does that tower have elves on it?
(APP IDEA!)
Angry Elves.
“Coal? Oh no, I’m going to make you WISH you were getting coal this year!”
“What do you mean I can’t have a Galaxy Nexus! I’M ERIC SCHMIDT’S SON!!!”
“Sorry kid, I stop supporting Blackberry last quarter.”
Ben Affleck’s charity gig as Santa got off to a rough start.
yesss, santa is finally touching me like this :’) -tears of joy-
You better not shout, you better not pout, you better not cry, I’m telling you why! Cause Santa Claus will make you cry!
Santa, please! Just loosen your grip and I swear I’ll never ask for an Iphone again!
Santa: Apple is suing HTC, Samsung and anyone that makes android phones
Kid: …..ok
Santa: isnt that sad? doesnt that ruin your christmas spirit?
Kid: no.
Santa: THATS IT YOUR BEING FED TO THE REINDEER
Kid: D:
You better watch, you better watch out, Santa Claus is about to kill you!
What?!? Santa uses CarrierIQ to know if I’m naughty or nice?!?
I don’t want an iThing, I want the NexThing
“Since “it” won’t stop crying, I don’t know what to bring for Christmas. Hmm… Elf, bring me my Galaxy Nexus! Maybe the Google Goggles app can tell me if this kid is a boy or girl.”
Santa: Oh….so you’d like a new galaxy nexus for christmas? TOO BAD! YOU’RE GETTING AN IPHONE!!
Kid: NOOO! Please don’t use this photo on Phandroid’s caption contest!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T GIVE ME A MOTOROLA WITH AN UNLOCKED BOOTLOADER?!?!?!?! YOU’RE FREAKING SANTA!!!!
Look kid, I’m Santa Clause not God, not even I can get you an iPhone with a 4.3″ screen!
“Whoa, relax kid…I was only joking! Apple didn’t really invent the yellow turtleneck. I swear.”
Santa stop poking me with your candy kane lmao
Santa: Sorry, there is no HSPA+ Galaxy Nexus in the US yet. So none for you.
Kid: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Santa I thought you flew international! Just pick me one up from Europe!
“Sorry kiddo, but do you honestly believe that my elves really know how to make a galaxy nexus phone in our little workshop built to make wooden toys? I don’t exactly hire rocket scientists for the job…er, I mean electrical engineers, for that matter. However, some friends over at this company called Apple were nice enough to donate…”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Galaxy Nexus thief serves out community service sentence: listening to kids cry about being made to wear ugly outfits by mom
Mom! Santa said the Transformer Prime is not real!
Santa:WAIT you’re not one of my elves. Awe f*#k it, if Jerry Sandusky can get away with it I guess I’ll give it a try.
Santa: I’m going to hold you tight little boy, try not to draw attention to yourself.Stevie: Noooooooooooo Mr. Jackson I meen Santa.
I’m going to hold you tight little boy, try not to draw attention to yourself.
Stevie: Noooooooooooo Mr. Jackson I meen Santa.
Santa just said the Elves ran out of Galaxy Nexus phones. She’ll have to get an iphone.
“Nice to see you again little boy. Don’t you recognize me? Its me, Jerry Sandusky.”
“But Santa, I don’t want another yellow sweater!”
“C’mon Santa….. only 1 hour to go.”
All I wanted for Christmas was a 3-pin card dock for my Verizon Galaxy Nexus!
Our youngest child was utterly unconsoleable upon learning from the Big Red Elf that the Rezound would not get S-OFF.
Santa: You look good, kid, it fits you!
Young Chris: Nooo, I want a V-neck!!
“Santa: You see kid, you’re being bamboozled. These capatalist fat cats are inflating the profit margin and reducing your total number of toys.
Kid: This guy’s a Commie. He’s spreading propoganda.”
–Seinfeld ref
Verizon Claus’ sad attempt to convince Google to make the next Nexus device a Verizon exclusive.
That face on “Santa” says “Really?”
A Kyocera Echo what?!?! Whaaaaaa!
“How many times do I have to tell you, Mom, I am allergic to Santa dander!”
Whatever They Pay Santa, It Isn’t Enough.
Terror in Toyland
Be Afraid…Be Very Afraid.
“I don’t want to sit on this creepy old guy’s lap.”
“You will be paying therapy bills for years to come!”
Who is more afraid – Santa or the child – “Get me outta here!!”
“Santa’s going to eat me!”
Some day she’ll think Santa is wonderful, but today is not that day!
“Please Help Me Mommy”
“No, I’m crying because my shoes really hurt!”
“No, I’m crying because the Packers blew their undefeated season.”
(I know – only the first one qualifies, but the photo just brought so many images to mind – I’ve gone through this with my own 3 kids!)
Because she was naughty, young Siri never received the gifts that she had asked for from Santa. That fateful Christmas morning, she announced “I will spend my last dying breath if i need to, and I will spend every penny of Apple’s $40 billion in the bank to right that wrong by making sure NOBODY ever gets what they ask for.”
Little Timmy Peterson finds out his dad cashed in his college fund on a “sure thing” investment in RIM stock. Wait until he finds out Blackberry 10 is a bigger hoax then his dad dressed as Santa.
This is what signing a “Big Red” contract feels like.
I am not an Ice Cream Sandwich Mr. Wozniak! I’m a real boy!!
If I don’t win this Holidroid Contest I’m going to pee on you Santa!!!!
The child found out that he was part of another Santa + iPhone commercial.
Kid – “I saw Santa kiss my mom!”
Santa – “Oh f*ck!”
Kid: Santa!
Santa: Yeah.
Kid: You’re bringing my present early?
Santa: No
Kid: But I never told you what I wanted.
Santa: I said I didn’t bring it, dipstick.
Kid: WAAAHHHH!!!
I am just trying to teach him proper hygiene…honestly.
The only thing worse than pulling Santa’s over-sized beard and realizing he is fake is Santa telling you that you can’t get your new Android device for Christmas due to supply issues. If only Santa’s elfs worked in Asus’s market forecasting department.
Santa “come on kid this is my part time job with the economy being so bad”.
Kid ” Help me mama, he smells like pee and he’s really scaring me.
Santa’s thinking, “Gosh the things I do to earn extra money for Android gadgets. Fat suits, crying babies, ugh I wish Santa was real.”
[email protected]
Kid: Candy corn?
Santa: Well they all can’t be winners…
What? Another patent lawsuit from Apple? Nokia is making Windows phones? And Santa is really Paul Rudd? Hold me back, Santa Rudd, hold me back. Imma wild out in this mutha!
“The RAZR is a phone, Timmy. I’m not going to slice you!”
Santa “You know, I used to wear green until Coca Cola put me in their television ads wearing red!”
Kid: “Wow! Really? Are you being serious!!?!? So this means I can have a life’s supply of Coca Cola for Christmas, and you top me up every year????!!!”
Santa “Sure, but I only have diet…”
Moooooommmmm!!!! Santa just told me that he’s from Apple and he’s going to sue me for infinging on the patent they own for sitting on Santa’s lap!
Wait….. thats not a Galaxy Nexus in your pocket??!!!!!!
Sorry son, Santa can’t deliver any presents this year. He’s being sued by Apple for infringing on their iSleigh patent.
Little did this serial killing child know that Santa Claus was actually an undercover cop. Here is seen arresting the “cereal killer,” who is visibly upset at the turn of events.
Santa: “What would you like for Christmas, kiddo?”
Kid: “I would like for Google, and all the major carriers, to work together to release Ice Cream Sandwich to all Android smartphones by the end of the year!”
Santa: “Sorry kid, even Santa can’t do that.”
Kid: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Santa: Why are you crying?
Kid:Because I cannot take one more Apple related caption. Even at my age I know these are not funny, clever or original. I am sooooo tired of this Santa and I will cry until the madness stops.
He just told me his name was Jerry Sandusky
an iPhone?!? First you give me a zune, and then a 4 GB ipod when I could of had a 500 GB Archos running android. What kind of sadist are you?
KY personal lubricant… Always be prepared
“No, you can’t have the Galaxy Nexus. The release was delayed again, but my dry cleaner said it might come out tomorrow or the next day or the next day or the next day so it must true.”
I’m sorry kid. This is the 70’s so they don’t have cell phone yet…
It was at this very moment that Draco Malfoy vowed to destroy Gryffindor house and kill Albus Dumbledore.
I don’t want to tell Siri what I want for Christmas! I want to tell you Santa! Hey you’re not Santa you’re Steve Jobs!
Santa, “Hey sweetie, What do you want for Xmas? How about an iPhone 5?
Child, “Nooo, every year you bring me the same thing. Last year it was iPhone 4, the year before that it was iPhone 3GS. I’m tired of you tricking me!! Their all the same, your just changing the names and numbers :'( I want a SAMSUNG GALAXY NEXUS!!!
hey kid! in the future george dubya will get two terms at presidency, the US will fall
into another recession, steve jobs will pass and get treated like a god, verizon will
torture the world with the launch of the nexus, and you’ll probably end up being a
jersey shore guido douche. good luck with that!
Kid: “Santa, I want to meet my favorite musician/idol Justin the cool Biebs for Chrismtas!”Santa: ” But Buddy, Justin Bieber isn’t real…”Kid: “Why can’t you just leave Justin Alone!!!!!!!”
Hey sit still kid! Before I replace that Galaxy Nexus with a Blackberry…..
“The day Santa told me I wasn’t a boy.”
The iPhone is the greatest phone in the world
As he did for the other North Korean masses, Kim Jong-Il’s son poses as Santa and offers this kid a Galaxy Nexus to pretend he is saddened by the passing of the North Korean dictator.
“I’ve seen the commercial, you only use Siri! I can’t trust you to grant me my wish of Android!”
But I don’t want any apple products!
“You mean I don’t get a Galaxy Nexus? I want my Nexus…!”
KID: “I WANT ICE CREAM SANDWICH AND THE GALAXY NEXUS, NOW!!!”
Santa: ” Another case of parents vicariously living through their child…sigh…”
“Sorry, i can’t give you a Transformer Prime by Christmas, oh Optimus Prime, ssshhh calm down, that i can do”
“Help me, Baby Jesus! Santa just told me he works at Penn St!”
One winter night, Santa was entertaining a child with stories of a time before cell phones and 3G, when who should stop by but Big Red himself.
Big Red said, “Santa, I’m sorry. We made you the official spokesman of Verizon last year. Now all the kids want an iPhone, Droid RAZR, and Galaxy Nexus. We just got hit with another 4G LTE service disruption.”
Santa glowered at Big Red and told the little child, “Son, there will be no Christmas this year.”
Santa: You’ve been a naughty boy, and for that, I’m shutting off Verizons 4G…again.
Waaaaaaaah… Mommy Santa said Android’s not a real OS! You’re going to hell Santa!
I’m not really Santa Claus … and you’re definitely not getting anything for Christmas besides an iPhone 3g with at&t coverage.. on yeah .. you better not tell you mom what I said or else! (In a low whispering voice)
Mommy, tell this clown Transformer Prime is real!! Phandroid says Canadians are getting one! Go check the Great White North, Santa!
this is the day justin bieber found out he was a boy instead of a girl.
Santa: “Quickly! Strike, but strike true. We’ll only get a single shot with this one!”
You’re not Santa! You smell like…. Apples!
“If Siri had told my mom where an abortion clinic was I wouldn’t be stuck in these ridiculous pants”
Sorry Kid,
Somebody has to get that warehouse of Windows 7 phones Microsoft sold me on!
Maybe NEXT time you don’t Pee on my leg and I’ll get you something in an Android phone!
Santa telling Steve Jobs he was reincarnated as a little kid, but still stuck with an iPhone for Christmas.
…and on that fateful day, Larry Page promised to build a new world. A beautiful and enticing new world where human-to-human interaction would never be required again.
“Unfortunately, Santa can’t give you better parents.”
Young Timmy is outraged after being forced to sit on Santa’s lap after Santa’s let loose a really bad fart and then told that there will be no Galaxy Nexus for him this Christmas.
Santa: What would you like little boy?
Kid: An Android phone! An Android phone!
Santa: How about an iPhone instead? They are more basic, they’re practically made for kids!
Kid: WAAAAAAAAAA!
“Waah! Those Android users and making phone of my iPhone! Santa, tell me I am still hip!”
Sorry Son, Courts say that I infringe on Apples patent for Santa, I have round corners and a touch sensitive beard.
“The subscript:’The exact moment and cause of me becoming evil’ Photo taken directly from Steve Jobs autobiography.”
– If I had a Galaxy Nexus I could have snapped a pic before the screaming and the crying.
Kid, you can’t be one of 700,000 people a day this year. But I have some iPhones if you want that.
I try to engage you in a thoughtful discussion of geopolitics and all you want to do is give me a ****ing phone! What is this world coming to?!?!?!!?
Mom!! This Santa has a third leg!!!
Little Johnny is experiencing the same feeling his father felt when the other Big Red didn’t deliver the goods this Holiday. Even though both “Rule The Air” I don’t think the little guy is too pleased.
Santa: HO HO HO what would you like for Christmas young boy
Boy: I want a Galaxy Nexus Santa: no no how about we talk about the first thing that pops up?? HO HO HO
Boy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH RUNNNNNN
Timmy: The Galaxy Tab 10.1 is just too big! How am I going to get my Android tablet fix now?!??
Santa: Don’t worry, Timmy. My elves are hard at work on an 8.9 inch model that should be just your size. Phandroid.com will be packaging it up just for you in time for Christmas delivery. Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas!
“I’m sorry darling but it’s true, your phone does indeed utilize Carrier IQ.”
Santa: Im gonna rip your arms apart you charlie brown imposter!
Kid: But Dad!!
No Santa…i Do NOT want your iPhone prototype.
In King Leonidas’s voice: “This is not the real SANTA!!!!”
Santa: Okay kid, sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that “Pops Up”
Kid: Oh sh!t I felt it… I need to get the F!$% out of here!
Kid is upset cause santa told him he was a bad boy and that he was gonna get a iphone 3 instead of coal
I’m sorry kid, it’s only 1977, the only droids I ever heard of are R2D2 and C3PO.
Santa just said I can’t have a Chris Chavez haircut for Christmas!!!
Santa: “Hold still you little f@cker!”
Kid: “WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! You’re not Santa, you smell like beef & cheese and sit on a throne of lies!!!!!”
at this point Santa’s phone begins vibrating and siri is is screaming no!
I swear kid, that’s not a iPhone in my pocket I’m just happy to see you
“Sorry Timmy, you won’t be getting the Galaxy Nexus for Christmas.. As a consolation, here’s an ice cream sandwich.
“Santa, let me go so i can go get my Galaxy Nexus that is finally out!”
Santa Clause: “Chris never told you what happened to your father.”
Kevin Krause: “He told me enough! He told me you killed him!”
Santa Clause: “No. I am your father.”
Kevin Krause: “No… that’s not true! That’s impossible!”
santa does’t smell like gingerbread and cookies, he smell’s like booze and vomit with a hint of apple. santa killed steve jobs!!!!!!!!!” ahhhhh
What do you mean their out of Galaxy Nexuses. Okay fine I’ll get a rezound. What I have to get a razor!?
I’d be crying too
Santa: Sorry Timmy, but the Galaxy Nexus won’t be released until next year.
Timmy: Awww, well that’s okay Santa. At least I’ll be able to play “I Am Alive” on my new Phantom console this Christmas!
Santa: Errr…well…about that…umm…
Timmy: ….WAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S. Who won yesterday?
I asked you for Zubaz last year and you gave me these cheap knock offs!
Let me go!!! If you can’t promise me an ASUS Eee Pad Transformer then I’m gonna lie down on the floor and have a fit until my parents promise me one!
Billy’s punishment from Santa for being naughty was being forced to watch as Mrs. Claus changed outfits.
“Mommy! Get me out of here! Phandroid says there’s only a few more days of the Holidroid contest and I need to make sure I don’t miss my chance in a ‘1st to post’ challenge!!”
“What’s that Santa?! What do you mean ‘What’s an Android?’… It’s 1977?? I have to grow up smartphone-less??!! Ahhhhhh!!
Santa tried to tell little jimmy that it was just a candy cane in his pocket. But jimmy didn’t believe him.
“Let me go Mr.Jobs even if you pretend to be Santa Claus I still hate you and your Apple products! I said I want marbles for Christmas and that’s that!!!!!!!” (Tear streams down Steve’s cheek)
“I am sorry to break it to you kid, but there ain’t no thing as a DroidClaus.”
This is what happens when Santa doesn’t get what he wants.
Kid: “You look my age with a fake beard on.”
Santa: “I’LL RIP YOUR LIMBS OFF!”
Kid: “NOOOOOO, I knew I should have just went to phandroid.com!”
Child: MOMMY! Santa says I owe Apple $4.03 million in patent infringements for getting my photo taken with him! I don’t have the moneeeey!!!!
No wonder most kids want an iProduct for Christmas: Santa “iWorkforApple” Claus is brainwashing every child sitting on his lap at the mall. “Oh, don’t worry kid. It’s only hurt a bit, like an ant bite. Ho ho ho.” (Note: In the photo is Siri being brainwashed then kidnapped then enslaved when she was a child, as you can tell she is soulless when she replies to your request. And this photo will be the official cover for Siri’s Christmas Card.)
Is this kid crying because of his outfit or because he’s afraid creepy young guys wearing outfits to like like fat old guys that sneak into their house while they are sleeping and stealing his cookies?
“The beard….. It’s is growing! It’s trying to eat me!”
“My hemorrhoids!!!!”
Santa whispers in the kid’s ear: “There is a 4.0.4 update coming for the Galaxy Nexus… and it has TouchWiz”
“Got Preparation H?”
“OMG, David Stern killed the cp3 trade. Now you’re telling me we lost khole khardashian to Dallas!?”
What the? This isn’t Hanukkah Harry!!!
“You pulled my beard to make sure I’m Santa….I’m just checking to see if you’re Pinocchio”
An iPhone? You’ll not only shoot your eye out but, also Siri will come and eat my cookies, turn off Rudolph’s nose and when you ask her about me she will say I am not real!
“For Christmas you get a Motorola Backflip.”
Mommy! Santa is STONED!!
Santa: -_- So the kid tries to eat my beard because he thought it was cotton candy, and now it’s my fault that he’s crying?!….Yea, I’ll make sure this kid gets a stuffed animal with it’s head cut off.
If you ever wanna see your kid again send me a million cookies and gallons of milk or else !
Steve Jobs travels back in time as Santa and try’s to change history by selling a young Eric Schmidt an iPhone.
Santa finally let the cat out of the bag… He told little Sally that her parents weren’t real… they’re just Santa.
Santa: “Alright… I’ll hold him down. You give it to him.”
Kid: “PLEASE!” *cries* “NO!!! ANYTHING BUT THAT!”
Kid: Someone drew Harry Potter glasses on me again!!!
“let me go Mr. Sandusky, I’m Jewish and I already got what i wanted 3 nights this week!”
Santa: “I ate your Ice Cream Sandwich, hehehe.”
Kid: “NOOOOOOOOooooo…”
Santa: “Ah crap I’m gonna lose my job because this kid can’t take a joke.”
Santa: Well child I heard you were bad this year. So you are going to get coal for Christmas, but not just ordinary coal, Apple’s new magical ICOAL.
Child: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Police officer: This photo is evidence, now just show me on the doll where Santa touched you.
Steve Balmer attempting to get america’s youth excited about Windows Phone.
Santa(Android) says to the little kid(apple) my Droids are winning the war, apple is the thing of the past.
Things white people do
Bieber @ age 3
Santa: Now, Joey, I have something very important to tell you. I am your father.
Joey: …….uh ok
Santa: And I use an iphone.
Joey: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Santa(who represents Android) says to the kid the Android platform has really taken off, but you was a bad little boy so I got you an iPhone..kid..noooooooooooo!!!
Santa: Whats that Jim? No….hes not ready to be an elf yet. His arms aren’t meaty enough. Throw him back in the dungeon…
Steve Jobs the Second
Poor Jewish kid is afraid of the bearded man(woman?) questioning her if shes been naughty or nice. Hanukkah fail?
He said that the Transformer Prime was only for good kids, and I’d have to settle for Bumblebee!
Santa: “Hold still you little f**ker!”
Kid: “WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! You’re not Santa – you smell like beef & cheese and sit on a throne of lies!!!!!!!”
Santa: Ho ho ho, my beard is so big that it contains 5000 different presents.
Child: I’m just here to make a silly face.
“OMG!!! THAT’S NOT SANTA!!!” -Buddy Elf at 2 years old.
His parents are bankrupt and dad didn’t win any android presents in the phandroid contest.
“Siri told me you’re not real!”
“Yeah I bet that bitch told you an iPhone is better than a Nexus also”
Please disregard this one. I changed it and it wouldn’t let me edit so I reposted. Thanks.
Kid: No! I don’t care about my front teeth! I want the Galaxy Nexus!
SANTA: “You think I’m scary now? Just wait until I sneak into your house on Christmas Eve! I see you when you’re sleeping, I know when you’re awake. Mwahaha!”
He lost the holidroid contest.
Kid: I’m one of the 99% and I’m not leaving until I get more free stuff.
Santa: Get off me kid!!!
Kid: Santa brutality, Santa brutality!!!
What do you mean Verizon’s LTE Network might go down again?!!?
What do you mean there’s a shortage of Transformer Primes? How many elves do you have working for you?
“All I want for Christmas is this little boy.”
Nexus you say?
I’m sorry Billy!,
I thought you wanted an iPhone.
No, Virginia, there IS no ICS update for your Samsung Vibrant. Shhhh. Or Honeycomb. Stop crying. Or Gingerbread…
Child: “I want the my touch 4g from T-Mobile”
Santa: “Don’t you mean Dish Network? They are next in line to buy T-Mobile”
Child: “You got to be kidding me! We gotta hear Dan Hesse cry like this?”
(insert annoying baby cry)
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Steve Jobs!!
I dont want a fake santa, I want the real one, Eric Schmidt!
iphone, ipad…….I don’t want a STUPID IPHONE or IPAD!!! Where is my Ice Cream Sandwich!! I WANT MY ICE CREAM SANDWICH!
kid: “You’re limiting my data? 20MB for $50? ARE YOU CRAZY?!?!?! Oh…I get LTE? I guess that’s ok. Wait, your network went down?
MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!”(the kid is in yellow, so clearly he’s a Sprint fan outraged by Santa’s Verizon.)
SANTA, Y U NO GIVE GSM GALAXY NEXUS?
“What do you mean by I ‘can’t upgrade until tomorrow?!'”
“Tell Sandusky… er… I mean Santa what you want for Christmas”
Santa: “Oh it’s a simple game, you pull really hard and whoever gets the biggest piece makes a wish.”
“Please Santa get me the Galaxy Nexus or my mom will buy me the iPhone 4s. NOOO!!!”
Looks like someone isnt getting a galaxy nexus for the holidays
No, you’ll shoot your eye out.
classic, was that or:
MAMA, SANTA IS TRYING TO SANDUSKY ME #TOOSOON?
“SANTA USES AN IPHONE?!?! NOOO GET ME AWAY!!!”
Little Sally discovers Santa’s dark secret when she is in line *after* the little girl who told Santa, “All I want for Christmas is two front teeth.”
I looked in your stocking; its an iPhone
“What do you mean I have been naughty and I can only have *either* the white Droid Razr or an iPhone 4S!?!?!?”
Santa: No, it’s the truth, kid. Andy the Android is NOT real!
Here’s my Caption (I hope my comment to SuperChunk above doesn’t count):
“Santa got a little more for Christmas than he bargained for as he felt the warm liquid from another distressed baby soak through his red velvet pants.”
Kid:what do you mean apple got the nexus banned!!??
“Maybe If I cry loud enough I can get a galaxy nexus not another flip phone…I’m so done with the ice age”
Santa: “Sorry son, but Sprint isn’t getting the Galaxy Nexus anytime soon. You’ll have to switch to Verizon.”
Kid: “But they want an $800 deposit for two lines!”
Santa made me hold his sack… there’s no way present will fit in that thing! WAAAAAHHHHHHH
“We ran out of coal, so you’re getting an iPhone in your stocking”
Your holding him wrong, kids have bad reception with the double hand death grip
Geesh, Santa said he was sorry for going down your moms chimney
Santa: You know, little girl, you would fit right in with the whole “Occupy” movement!
Red Wring of Death
“AHHH this strange looking man with the poodle on his face came down my chimney last year! he stole all of my gingerbread cookies and my ice cream sandwiches! guess he’ll steal my Galaxy Nexus this year “/ Argggg”.
This little orphan boy was already crying from having to sit on Santa’s lap, but he’d really be bawling if he found out that most abducted orphans ended up working slave-labor in the North Pole.
Hopefully no one else used this one but here goes:
Santa: I only said, he wanted an iPad 2 for Christmas and that Android sucks!
Nearby Elf: Steve Jobs is that you? Your alive?
Santa: I was reincarnated and it’s like being in hell. The body I got reincarnated to is an Android fan boy or Phandroid… or whatever they call themselves!
“and not a single gift was given that day”
Due to recent patent infringement lawsuits, Santa is forced to disclose to little Tommy that the Tooth-fairy has been granted rights over all “Proximal Maxilary Dentition” requests.
On a related note, the Easter Bunny was indicted for conspiracy to increase tooth decay rates in children.
Julie Ann: “No Santa, No! Tell me that wasn’t you in that iPhone commercial! Tell me you’re bringing me a Galaxy Nexus! Oh please Santa! Please!”
This job sucks. The things I’ll endure to get a Nexus.
“You mean I can only get a Galaxy Nexus for Christmas if I have a full upgrade available?! I JUST bought the iPhone and none of the software versions are named after food!”
Waiting on Samsung software updates:
It’s worse than having your arms ripped off by Santa.
Santa: Ok Billy, what do you want for Christmas?
Billy: I want a PS Vita!
Santa: Sorry Billy, that comes out next year
Billy: WAAAAAAAAAH
Santa: I didn’t sign up for this…
Child: SANTA SAID THERE ARE NO MORE TOUCHPADS!!!
Santa: I swear I clicked “buy it now”….
child says, Santa how could you get me stinky socks I wanted a Galaxy Next to us waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa …..all the cool cats have them now I days waaaaaaaaaaaa I am not putting milk or cookies out for you this year punk. Santa says, And thats what I give you a Galaxy Next to us……hohoho The Milky Way.
“Santa, Apple just sued you, says its going cost an arm and a leg to settle, how do you want to proceed?”
*Headline*
This was the scene at a New York mall today, as news quickly spread that Apple Co. had won exclusive rights to the Christmas holiday, banning the sale or gifting of any competing products during the winter holidays this year inside the continental U.S.
“I don’t know why *you’re* crying. I’m the one who just got peed on.”
Timmy begins to cry as he realizes Santa apparently only saw his Christmas sketch from 10 feet away and mistook his request for a new a Galaxy Tab for an iPad.
Caption:
Kevin Krause giving back to his community. Poor soul never stood a chance.
Only three more Phandroid Happy Holidroid contests left!? Let me go enter Santa, let me go!
New movie poster. “Santa Clause does Phandroid” starring Ted Bundy as Santa Claus and Ewok number 5 as the pissy little child.
MOM! THERE IS SOMETHING IN HIS BEARD!!!
Nooooooo! I don’t want to wait till February for my Droid 4!!!
Warning.. this is your Santa without a beenverified.com background check. Lol
Kid: I want a Galaxy Nexus for Christmas please.
Santa: We are out. I only have iPhones left :/
Kid: wwaaaaAAHHHHH!!!!!!
Santa with an evil smirk: “Come here little boy.” Kid starting to cry: “Ahhhh! Mom, he’s going to kill me! I’ve been naugh-tyyy!”
“Mommy, he said my phone he is bringing will be faux-G, not 4G!”
“what do you mean the Galaxy Nexus is only on Verizon?!?”
“ho, ho, ho, thank you Timmy for telling me what you want for Christmas, and for letting me know you have to go to the bathroom. However, normally you tell someone prior to going… ho, ho, oh no!
The kid just jerry sandusky was hired as the new mall santa
How the Android stole Christmas (for some)
John used to be a software engineer at Apple, but after the wildly successful Android OS stold a large marketshare from his company; he lost his job. Now 38 and divorced, he must moonlight as Santa Clause in an 80’s themed botique to pay his child support and drinking habit.
How the Android stole Christmas (for some)
John used to be a software engineer at Apple, but after the wildly successful Android OS stold a large marketshare from his company; he lost his job. Now 38 and divorced, he must moonlight as Santa Clause in an 80’s themed botique to pay his child support and drinking habit.
“Me no want this cotton candy. Me want ice cream sandwich. Waaaa!!”
“Yes, Santa, I want…. OH MY GOD!! IT’S A GREEN ROBOT!!”
A picture of little Jimmy after Santa told him he’s getting a VTech InnoTab instead of a Kindle Fire.
Kid: No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
Santa Claus: You’ll shoot your iPhone out, kid.
I’m not crying because Santa’s holding me. I’m crying because the reindeer are flying away with my presents!
December 14, 1974 the day little Sally Osborne discovered that Santa was really her older brother Tom.
Little Girl: 01110000 01101000 01100001 01101110 01100100 01110010 01101111 01101001 01100100 00101110 00101110 00101110 01100111 01101001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100101 00100000 01101101 01111001 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110000 01110000 01111001 00100000 01101000 01101111 01101100 01101001 01100100 01110010 01101111 01101001 01100100 00100000 01100111 01101001 01100110 01110100 01110011 00100000 01001110 01001111 01010111 00101110 00101110 00101110 00100000
Santa: HUH (is she possessed)?
Dec 22 2011: Little Billy lets out a rage comic “FFFUUU” after Santa informs him it will be 369 days till he receives his presents. Billy didn’t realize he is sitting with the 2012 mall Santa in an attempt for retails to get an early jump start on next years Christmas season.
Johnny just found out that Apple hired Santa as the iPhone spokesman this Christmas and that all of the people who asked for a Nexus will be getting an iPhone 4s instead.
As the crying kid sat in his lap, Santa realized, “Nobody ever cares what I want for Christmas..” Afterward this event, Santa turned in his letter of resignation and flew away on his melancholy sleigh. Thanks for all your years of service, Santa. We hardly knew you.
“What do you mean I’m on the naughty list again? Just cause I hid daddy’s phone in a brownie from my easy bake oven?”
That better be a Galaxy Nexus in your pocket Santa or I’m so calling the po po.
Santa says Ef you, Ef you, your cool, (winks at kids mother) Ef you and Ef you, after I lock you in this ancient ninja death grip im out :)
Mom, Santa’s a commie!!
Sorry son, but tis true, Apple won all of their patent lawsuits, Android is done.
Santa: where’s the volume control on this damn thing??
” Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, Mom, Santa has nits in his beard”
But why can’t I have a cell phone Santa. Everyone in my school has one and I what a Galaxy Nexus so………….. bad. Please I’ll be good……
Chris chaves christmas nightmares
A year of RIM.
What do you mean “the Easter Bunny isn’t real?”
Reaction of the new hire when she found out if she wants health care she’s gonna have to wait for Obama care Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
Santa: “B-but.. but I got you both the things on your list!”
(Here’s what Santa got him:)
Root ICS. nice
Santa: “Is that an Ice Cream Sandwich in your pants or are you happy to see me kid?”
“You’re not the real Santa! You’re one of his helpers dressed up as Santa! I want your BOSS!”
Santa: Now, little boy…What would YOU like for Christmas?
Boy: Weww, I’ve always weawy wanted my own phone. How about that new Gawaxy Nexus! That wooks pretty cool.
Santa: Ho Ho Ho…I’m sorry- it appears that I don’t have any of those. However, I do have a jolly ol’ iPhone 4s…wait no maybe it’s an iPhone 4; I can’t tell. Anyway, here’s an iPho-
Boy: WAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! NOOOOOO!! I’m becoming Jewish…….
Jeffy just learned that his android phone won’t be getting an upgrade to ice cream sandwich.
No.. I can’t get you a Transformer Prime from Asus before Christmas…
NOOOOO….let me go!….I don’t want to work for isheep BGR…Santa: Damn free will
Well….Now we know why Sam Caplar from XDA T.V doesn’t believe in Santa Claus!!!
Kid: “Ouch” (crying begins)
Santa: “Oh sorry kid, I forgot I left my samsung galaxy note in my pocket”
I’m sorry son but Apple patented Android and you wont be getting any new phones
Bad news kid, I’m not the real Santa. The good news, the real Santa wouldn’t have given you the clothes you’re wearing.
After several years of iPhone, iPad, and iTouch shortages Santa planned ahead and had his elves making them all year long in anticipation for the regular run on apple products. As the Christmas lists poured in Santa wasn’t prepared for the many many Kindle Fires, galaxy tabs, razrs and SGIIs people asked for. Santa is now forced to peddle his unwanted products.
“Now Suzy…..listen to me, I don’t think you really understand. You may think you want that 4.5 inch screen, but let me explain to you the advantages of having a nice, portable, smaller screened device…..and don’t forget about Siri……..wait, wait, did you know they have a drop down menu now, just like the phone you want”
The kid- santas pants are sticky and wet on my leg momy!!
Santa- uh um well…. thats where i uh keep my uh half eaten candy canes?
HASBRO is not the only one angry with ASUS. After last year’s unfortunate misunderstandings, Santa learned the hard way that children weren’t asking for form-changing toy robots anymore.
Santa: “I’m sorry kid. I won’t be back next year. Apple is suing me after being granted a patent for spreading Christmas cheer.”
There, there, AT&T. There will always be other merger options in the future.
But I don’t want anymore sweaters for Christmas!!!
MOM!!!! This fat guy said my Droid 4 is delayed again!!!!
Hey, thats not an android in your pocket!
Hey kid, this is gonna be you in 20 years when you can’t find a real job….
Phandroid’s True Technology Stories: The Day Google was truly started
35 years ago, Steve Ballmer worked as a mall Santa in his home state of Michigan. A 3 year old by the name of Larry Page went to that same mall and told Santa what he wanted for Christmas.
Larry: “All I want is a platform that makes source code available for anyone.”
Santa grabbed the 3 year old boy and whispered into his head: “Santa doesn’t like children that use bad words like open source, you’re getting coal for Christmas.”
Santa: So kid, what would you like for Christmas?
Kid: I’d like some Ice Cream Sandwich please!
Santa: Uhm…I can get you a nice Apple. Would you like an Apple?
Kid: NO!!!! I WANT ICE CREAM SANDWICH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NO NOT Hasbro Optimus Prime, I WANT THE ASUS Transformer Prime!!! Don’t you know there is a difference????
Santa: What do you want for Christmas boy?
Kid: I want an iPhone
Santa: Sorry kid, my elves aren’t able to make those, but I can send you to the mines of the Congo so you can get the materials to make one yourself. Ho! Ho! Ho!
Kid: (crying)
Little Timmy is distraught after Santa tells him “It doesn’t matter what you want kid, because if the Mayan’s are right, you and your whole family will all be dead before next Christmas anyway. Next!”
I know kid, I just wet my pants too.
What do you mean you’re taking me to the north pole??? Noooooooooooooooooo verizon doesn’t get 4g there yet!!!!!
Santa: Get back here kid! I’m sure your parents are still at happy hour!
Kid: Let go of me ya fat old perv. I WANT MY MOMMY!!!!!!!
“That had better be your phone vibrating in your pocket, Mister!”
Santa: “Don’t cry little fella. I’m sure you will recieve an update for Ice Cream Santawich soon.”
Boy: “It’s Ice Cream Sandwich!, whaaa”
Santa: “Dare, dare. Here have a donut.”
I’m a little salty I didn’t think of this one myself.
“Don’t worry little Jimmy, it’s just your creepy uncle Ned in a Santa suit. He’s home from prison just in time for Christmas!”
Santa: Calm down I’m great with kids. My last job was at Penn State
Dad, RUN!! He knows about the hooker in the trunk!!!
The Galaxy Nexus is delayed again!
“For your gift, sit on my lap and I’ll give you the first thing that comes up.”
Poor kid won’t get to play flash games on his android phone when he grows up
SANTA : im so sorry my child but we are out of android devices with ice cream sandwich….we do have the new iphone4s its a pretty fast phone it competes with some of the android devices! KID : MOM!!!!!!! he said theres no more android devices so he wants to give me an apple…..tell him i want the phone with ice cream sandwich apples are nasty!
Santa began to wonder if the “Free Bowl Haircut for Every Child” promotion was such a good idea after all…
“what do you mean i’m too young for a cell phone????!! ALL MY FRIENDS ALREADY HAVE ONE!!!!!!!!”
” COME AT ME BRO! COME AT ME!!” little Ronnie yelled as Santa tried to restrain him.
“MOM…I said I wanted some Red Fanta…..not the scary bearded man who breaks into our house every year…..Waaaahhh!!!!!!!!!”
Little Suzy had quite a reaction after Santa told her she was on his naughty list and would be receiving an iPhone in her stocking this Christmas.
“Yes Bobby your on the Naughty list. I’m sorry but coal just wasn’t cutting it. We had to bring out the big guns. Yes your getting an iPhone for Christmas!! That should teach you to be naughty!! Calm down! Its only 2 years of your life. Keep screaming and I’ll make sure its on AT&T!”
Santa: how would you like an apple for christmas?
Kid: NOOOOOO i want an ice cream samich! wahhhhhhhhhh
I DON’T WANT and iPad!
“What do you mean, these pants won’t be in style when I grow up? Let go! Stop!…I wanna hammertime!”
The Santa tracker app said the real Santa was going to be here; who is this imPOOOOOOOOOOOOO(ster).
“Sorry kid, but I can’t guarantee a Holidroid Contest win.”
I think this Santa is from Penn State!
Santa: Shhh kid, be a good boy now (I hope no one else notices I farted).
Oh nooooooo I left my wish list at home!!!
Santa: Sorry kid, you are too young for a cellphone.
Kid: I hate you Santa, mommy said you would get me whatever I wanted.
Santa: You can’t even read!
[Santa is astounded when he learns that the user does not in fact enjoy Carrier IQ.]
ALLLLL I WANT IS MY TWO FRONT TEETH!!!!!!! THE ICE CREAM SANDWICHES TOOK THEM AWAY!!!!
Boy looks at the gift section and only sees a basket fully filled of apples….
Santa: sorry kid, no one likes apples, they all love donuts, eclairs, froyos, gingerbreads, honeycombs and ice cream sandwiches… u could take the whole basket of apples home….Kid: cries out loud*****After the picture was taken*****Santa: alright alright, how about a Samsung Galaxy Tab 8.9???Kid: ;)
little boy “Ipad tablets are not better that Android tablets” wa wa wa
The day Santa told me that Phandroid sold itself to AOL
Santa: Kid…KID…..you just peed all over my BRAND NEW Galaxy Nexus….Merry Christmas to you too….
Santa, aka “big red” quickly improvises a meat shield when mistakenly approached by an angry mob of verizon customers.
I’m sorry son, but you’ve been found to infringe upon several of Apple’s design and technology patents. Prior art? Ho-Ho-Ho-No!
“Don’t cry, little Suzie. That’s just a Galaxy Nexus in Santa’s pocket.”
Joey still felt outraged that 1% of kids get all the best toys. But as the pepper spray approached he began to regret spearheading #OccupyLapland…
Santa: But kid, you can’t get your Tab. Apple patented square tabs. Sorry!
Kid: Nexus??? Wanna Nexus.
Santa: Nay, there’s a patent for touch unlock. You can get the device, but can’t legally unlock it.
Kid: What kind of Santa are you?
Santa: Worked for Apple as a lawyer, but I told them how ridiculous some of their patents are, got fired, now I have to… Shit! I mean, ho, ho, ho…
Kid: Moooom! I don’t like that Santa! Moooom!
“I don’t know WHAT WE’RE YELLING ABOUT!”
Even at young age little stevie jobs was crying and even threatening santa claus with a patent infringement lawsuit.
No, little girl, Santa doesn’t have “Deep Throat, the Kinect Experience” to give to good children. And that is NOT what the Galaxy Nexus means by “Facial Unlock”!
Santa Claus: Hey kid, so what do you want for this Christmas? Some V-necks?? Ho, Ho, Ho.
Kid: V-necks??? Mommyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!! (Crying)
– Chris Chavez realizes it’ll be decades before Santa can bring him his Galaxy Nexus for Christmas…
“There is no real Santa. Rudolph was real…but my brother in law ground him up for jerky last fall.”
When the little boy said he wanted an android tablet for christmas,
Santa replied, “Sure little boy how about an Android 2.2 tablet with Froyo!”.
In tears, he frantically replied, “I won’t even be able to play Angry Birds!”
In an effort to increase next year’s nice list, Santa pulled the arms off all of this year’s naughty kids.
” Why did i get an original iphone….. for $499 ? what a rip off!
Santa said he was bringing me a Vtech instead of a Galaxy Tab.
“Sorry kid, you were a good boy this year, but all they had left were iPhones…”
Child: im so excited to be first!
Santa: okay, okay so what do you wa…..
Crowd of children waiting in line: No fair Santa. He wasn’t standing in the right spot.
Santa: im sorry but although you were first in line, you were in the wrong spot.. I think we will leave it up to the rest of the boys and girls to see if you can be first. What do you think kids?
Crowd of children waiting in line: He’s not first.
Let the third kid in line go first.
Santa: Tough luck kid. Here have a candy cane.
All in good fun, I promise.
No Santa, I don’t want the iPhone. I said specifically the galaxy nexus. I hate you, I hate you!
“What do you mean Carrier IQ is how you track if I’ve been naughty or nice?!”
Santa: Will the mother of this little boy pick him up? I think his diaper is full.
Kid: No Mommy, No!!! I haven’t told Santa what I want for Christmas yet! waaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh wwaaaaaaahhhhhh!!! waaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!!
Santa: Ok, what do you want for Christmas?
Kid: wwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!! *FARTS*
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh! *FARTS*
What do you mean the elves are Occupying the North Pole?!?!?! Get them back to work, I want a Christmas!
I said I didn’t want my picture taken with you… Why are you holding in me in place for this crazy lady to take my picture? Who knows where this picture is going to end up one day.
“Screw this naughty and nice crap. It’s been 22 days of this stinking contest and Santa hasn’t gotten jack. The kid gets it unless I have a sweet Amazon Fire in my gloves by the next contest!”
MOM! Aunt Tom is making me sit on his lap again!
Santa: Here’s an iPhone4
Kid: But I’ve been a good boy! Why can’t I have a better phone?!
Santa: I’m keeping this one for myself!
Kid: Your beard’s not real.
Santa: No shit! It was real, but I got sick and all the hair fell out.
Kid: How come
Santa: I loved a woman who wasn’t clean.
Kid: Mrs. Santa?
Santa: No it was her sister.
Can’t go wrong with Bad Santa quotes.
Little sam screamed in terror as Santa’s Winpho7 vibrated near his boy parts.
Santa is reminded of the Grinch known as Apple as he stares in melancholy after hearing the child’s sobbing story of how all he wants for Christmas is his two front teeth after loosing them to an Apple.
Santa: Hey Kid your mamma its so fat she could be my wife! Ho, Ho, Ho.
Kid: Daddyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! (Crying)
Santa: Oh crap..
Noooooooo! What do you mean my phone isn’t getting the Ice Cream Sandwich upgrade! Should have got a Nexus!
The kid is crying do to the fact that Santa told him that @St1brew wasn’t going to win any of the phandroid.com happy holidroid contests!
That’s not the Droid I’m looking for!
“Why did Santa say I’m only getting coal this year? All I did was try to patent Christmas!”
Steve Jobs (December, 1962)
I know kid, I’d cry if I had those clothes and haircut too.
Apple wins a patent for a jolly man with a long white beard that bring gifts of joy. Is it very broad? Yes! Is it ridiculous? Yes! Yet Apple has just patented Santa and the results are seen as Santa ends up as a mannequin that sucks kids dry of creativity, happiness, and imagination.
“Apple. The gift that keeps on giving”
Jeezum Christmas! This kid cries louder than a Verizon customer waiting for a new phone.
Damn it Chris Chavez sit still.
“When Mr. Smith said that he’d give anything for a Galaxy Nexus, Big Red came to collect.”
Kid: “Mooommyyy! Santa has something hard and big moving in his pants!”
Santa: “No! Nooo! I swear, it’s not what you think! It’s just Mrs. Claus calling me on my new Galaxy Nexus.”
Well, if I sat on someone’s lap with that much beard, I might kick his balls! LOL!
NOOOOOOOO!!!!! Don’t take the picture yet!!! My eye makeup is making me look like a raccoon and I think Santa is 12!!! This has gotta be a nightmare!!! Stop trying to pull my arms off!!!
Santa: “I only thought he was a girl because of the pants. I didn’t mean anything by it.”
[email protected]
psst i’m nekkid under this suit… but it’s ok your mom and dad traded you for unlimited data…
Mommmmy!! He said they ate Rudolph for Thanksgiving because there weren’t any turkeys at the north pole!
“Don’t cry kid I never coached pen state football”
Santa: “You’ve been a very naughty boy this year, so for Christmas, you’ll be getting a visit from the ghost of Micheal Jackson. Merry Christmas!!!”
Boy: “WAAAAAAAHHH!!!!”
Santa Claus: Hi there littler girl. I bet you want the Twilight Saga collection for Christmas don’t you.
Kid: I’m a.. sniff.., i’m a boy… D’: wuaaaaaahhh! (crying)
Santa delivers the bad new at the T-mobile shareholders Christmas party.
“Santa, let me go! I have to get to my computer so I can enter Phandroid’s holiday contest!”
Boy: “Santa, all I want for christmas is a phandroid”
Santa: “What a phandroid?”
Boy: “You don’t know what a phandroid is? Waahaahhhahahahahahahah.”
Kid: I want an Official Red Ryder Android-Action Two-Hundred-Gigabyte Range Model Android Tablet!
Santa: Apple will SUE your eye out, kid. How about a nice iPad, instead?
Did anyone win the last video challenge yet?
First you dress me in this outfit!
Then you sit me on the lap of this kidnapper!
And then you tell me I can’t get Ice Cream Sandwich for Christmas!
What’s next…no money from the tooth fairy?
Kid: Mommy, Santa can’t say “Ho-Ho-Ho” anymore….apparently Apple holds the patent on that, too. Waaaaaahh!!
Santa: He-He-He
“But I don’t want a coloring book! I want what’s in the phandroid.com Happy Holidroid bag!”
You mean I could have gotten a Kindle Fire, a Galaxy Nexus, a jawbone jambox and more already from Santa Phandroid if I played the Holidroid contest! ARGH!!!
“Here are the long distance charges for calling me while I was roaming!!”
I’m sorry, you’ll have to wait another year just like everyone else for the Hobbit.
WAAAAAAH!!! MOMMY Santa says Googles Ice Cream Sandwich will rot my teeth…santa I dont want an apple I promise to brush my teeth!!!!!
Kid: “Santa FARTED, but I don’t smell candy canes! I want my candy canes! Mommy, make him fart!”
Santa: “I am your father.”
Boy: “No, no, that’s not true. That’s not possible!”
1st idea.
Santa: Look, kid, if you had one shot, one opportunity, to sit on Santa’s lap, and seize everything you ever wanted, one iPhone. Would you capture it or let it slip?
kid:(trying to run away) Nooo! Another white rapper ;/ still trying to make iPhone cool
2nd idea.(if possible)
Smartass kid: this santa is fake,I saw iphone christmas tv comercial yesterday, so how come u are sitting all day in the mall on christmas eve, when u have 3,7 billion appointments?
OMG MOM!!! Santa’s given up on Phandroid and said he gets me or your phone!! Just give the man the Nexus before he yanks my arms off!!!!!!!!
There is poop in my pants and I just want to play angry birds on my amazon fire!
You took my Cookie but you did not bring me a Nexus; i want my Cookie back
Yes dear, I know he is crying…but look at the clarity of this Android camera! You can actually see his fear! Isn’t it amazing?
“Quick! What’s the number for 9-1-1!!!”
Santa: i hate my job, when can i retire? I hope my paycheck isnt in gumdrops and candycanes this year…i realy want a flipscreen tablet in my sleigh next year…
Sorry about my reindeer running over your grandma kid, how about an iphone.
Me in background: “Ok, you said if I give you my child, I would be a winner on Phandroid’s Happy Holidroid Contest…Where’s my loot?!”
This kid wasn’t to happy when he pulled Santas beard and found out it was Jerry Sandusky, talk about crying out loud, literally!!
His Daddy hasn’t won the Phandroid,com Happy Holidroids contest, and the elf made him sit on his lap, too.
I don’t want to go to the North Pole with Santa! I don’t have 4G there!
Siri told me that you are just a make-believe character! Waaaaaaaaa
Blast! Santa IS omnipotent and DID have the testicular fortitude to show himself! Run for your life Rupert!
But Santa, I’ve been good all year and you promised me a Kindle Fire and I’ve been trying the last 27 days to win one from Phandroid but I’m afraid that I will only get a lump of coal for Christmas.
What list…..I didn`t bring a list! I uploaded my list to the cloud! Mom…Santa doesnt have the cloud!!!!
All I want for Christmas is a Red Ryder Bb gun. No way kid, apple might sue you.
SANTA: Now kid, you know that Apples are good for you, right? Ice Cream Sandwiches aren’t good for you at all! You want to be on the nice list, right?
KID: MOM! Santa’s forcing me to get Apples to be on the nice list! I want Ice Cream Sandwiches instead!
4 year old Andy Rubin’s 1968 Christmas Request:
“I want a telephone without a cord, and I want it to have a color television screen that shows beautiful polaroid stills and makes picture movies. I want to listen to records on it and talk to it and have search for anything in the whole world. And, it all has to fit in the palm of my hand so I can take it everywhere I go!”
Santa: “Sorry kid, Apple already patented that.”
Dude, Let me go the Verizon store closes in 5 min!!!!!!!!
Shhh, be quiet kid. I told you that was just a Galaxy Note in pocket!
This big fat guy’s going to eat me!!!!
You’re not Santa, you don’t smell like Christmas! And, I bet you can’t even get me that Galaxy Nexus I asked for!
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN’T HAVE THE ELVES MAKE ME A GALAXY NEXUS??!!!
Kid: Santa, I want a Galaxy Nexus!
Santa: Ho, Ho, Ho…but they recalled the Galaxy Nexus and there won’t be any this Christmas!
Photo taken after kid hears the news.
Santa: “I told you to give me your mom’s Nexus and I would give you what ever you want, you didn’t and I am trying really hard not to shake you”.
Kid: “I couldn’t do it….MOMMY, HELP! this is not the real Santa!”
Santa- “Hey Satan, I caught another one! Dress him up like an elf and chain him to the assembly line with the others.”
But i want my ice cream sandwich!!!!
With his stare of hopelessness Santa curses his reason for being there…
” Well damn Siri…what’s next ? A bunny costume for me to hop around in.”
The kid was quoted as saying: “What do you mean there’s no such thing as the Easter Bunny? Is anything real!?”
Perhaps Sandusky’s lap is more comfortable.
“He said he had a candycane for me, but he lied!”
Santa: I took back your Galaxy Nexus; I thought you were playing when you said all you want for Christmas is your two front teeth.
LIttle Girl: “I want my own pseudo-open source mobile operating system with a diverse catalog of devices from multiple manufacturers creating a vibrant and competitive wireless landscape…”
Santa: “They’ll sue your eye out kid!”
Santa: Ho, Ho, Ho. So tell me little fella what do you want for Christmas??
Little kid: I want a Transformer Prime!!!
Santa: Don’t you mean Optimus Prime?
Little kid: No! Transformer Prime, Transformer Prime!
Santa: Hey kid i saw the movie and i’m pretty sure is Optimus Prime… God!
Kid: Wuaaaaaaa wuaaaaaaa! (Crying)
Santa: Oh boy, here comes the dad…
“iPhone 4? iPhone 4 for Christmas? Why do you hate me so, Santa? I’ll take your coal.”
Look, kid,I know. I want one too, but Mrs. Claus can’t get me one either since Apple filed their injunctions at the north pole too.
Santa told this kid that Apple just bought Google!
Still, not as bad as Twilight!!! :P
But Santa I DON’T WANT AN IPHONE! I WANT THE GALAXY NEXUS!
I said I wanted an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
Occupy Santa’s lap!
“Santa said he would not get me the Samsung Galaxy Nexus”
Mama no!!! YOU really want me to tell a stranger what my lil heart desires for Christmas. I can see a string holding his hair in place… I he’s not real mama please get me away from him. Why would you do such a thing(crying frantically)
The reaction when Santa told him he was getting an iPad for Christmas.
This fat guy said he’s going to break into my house, steal my cookies and watch me sleep!
“Mom! This isn’t Santa, he can’t even tell me what song was sang during his last birthday” (Thank you Elf)
Santa : Kid calm down, I’ll get you what ever you want, just don’t pee on my Galaxy Nexus.
Kid : What did you just call me, Wahhhhh Mom Santa just called me a bad word!!
A precognitive child reacts poorly a vision of Ben Affleck’s (pictured here as Santa) future career.
I haven’t bothered reading any of the other captions, so I’m unsure if this is a repeat, but:
Santa: “Sorry kid, we ran out of Galaxy Nexuses. But hey, you can have this cool new iPhone!”
Kid: … *wails*
The child just realized jerry sandusky was the new mall santa. (EDIT)
What do you mean I can’t have real live angry birds for Christmas!
This santa sucks. I keep telling him about the Transformer Prime that I want and he keeps talking about some robot named Optimus Prime. WTF!!!
Let’s face it, we live in an ever changing technology world. When Santa asked this kid if she wanted the new Facebook Timeline for Christmas, she screamed “Nnnnnnnoooooooo! Please don’t make me!”
Santa: All I said was if he was a good little boy maybe his parents would buy him an iTouch.
Santa: “Dam what i have to do to get the nexus”
Santa: Fine! Fine, if I get you a galaxy nexus will you please stop crying!?
Kid: Whaaaa! I want 2! Whaaaa!
After massive lawsuits, NBC’s “To Catch a Predator” decided to hire actors who were of legal age to portray minors.
You’ve been naughty this year. You are getting an Iphone 4s.
A local Phandroid user reacts to Happy Holidroid contest rules
“Hey kid, your missing the Holidroid contest, they just posted a quickest response question”?
Santa: At my other job, I’m a coach for the Penn State football team.
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!! He said he’s going to bring me an iPhone for Christmas! I hate Santa!!
The weirdest episode of “To Catch a Predator” ever…
but i wanted AN ICE CREAM SAMMICH!! waaaaaaa :'(
“I can only get the Galaxy Nexus on Verizon?! But my mom has T-Mobile! Nooooooooo! This isn’t fair!”
Kid says to his ignorant mother holding an iPhone 4s “Mom it’s him it really is, it’s Santa”. SIRI responds “sorry but that is incorrect Santa is not real neither is the Easter bunny or the tooth fair”.
Santa or dentist, NO DIFFERENCE!
Little Johnny was beside himself, this Santa did not have any idea what a phone with ice cream sandwich was… the “real” Santa reads Phandroid, so this Santa must be an impostor!
Ohmigoshhhh! Santa, look! Steve Jobs is back from the grave!! Hide your phones, hide your tabs, he’ll be suing everybody out here! He gonna find you! He gonna find you!
Look kid i’ve been doing this all day, so all you have to do is scream as loud as you can, once you do that you will get whatever it is you want for Christmas! Your mom and dad will have no choice but to ignore their wants of a new Android!
Keep up the good work kid!
Which pocket did I leave my coal in? Was it the left leg? Someone better take this kid from me fast!
“If I had known then that in a few years this kid’s father would knock me off his roof and take my job… this little tike would probably have received coal that year. Nothing personal. Just the principle of the thing, ya know?”
… because I think the kid looks like a younger version of the kid from The Santa Clause!
Little Steve Jobs never did get over his fear of Big Red.
The Winklevii are forced apart and Cameron is placed on Santa’s lap first.
Little Johnny: “I’m too young to be in 70’s porn!”
“And so, this was the night, when little Timmy sat on his lap that he realized that even Santa could not help him win the Holidroid Contest.”
Tragic Story behind this picture :’l.
baby: is that a galaxy nexus in your pants?
Santa: no it’s an iPhone 4
Baby: waaaaaaaaaaa
Ho, ho, ho! I hear you want an iPhone for Christmas!
I just ran out of Kindle Fire’s child so your not getting one this year!!!
Guess I need to lower the power on the whoopee tazer to “stun.”
Santa just informed little Timmy that he’d not only be waiting 4 months to get ICS, but that he’d have to live with an ugly skin on top of it.
http://i180.photobucket.com/albums/x282/myhai91/santa-scream1.jpg
Forget the milk and cookies…
You’re not fooling anyone in that Santa costume, Ballmer… stop trying to pawn your Windows devices onto innocent little children!
Thanks to Santa’s hookup with CarrierIQ, he knew exactly how bad this little kid had been all year.
Santa: Have you been good, Timmy? So that I can give you the Galaxy Nexus? Did you visit phandroid.com daily as every kid should do? Are you a fan on Facebook, G+ and do you follow them on twitter?
Timmy: I have been good Santa, I have visited the site pretty often and I am a fan, but I confess, I visit androidpolice sometimes too :-/
Santa: You little prick, I’m gonna show you! Where’s that f*cking iPhone, Rudolph?