Mar 13th, 2017

A mysterious new Google app has hit the Google Play Store. It’s called Carrier Services, and its Google Play screenshots take us back to those glorious #HoloYolo years before Matias Duarte blessed us with his Material Design. They also have some pretty funny filler text.

So, what does it actually do? Here’s a description:

Carrier Services helps carriers provide mobile services using the latest networking capabilities. Carrier Services includes support for enhanced features in the Android Messages app.

The last of these 2 sentences makes us think it’s a background services app to bring the necessary bridge interface for RCS messaging in Android. Basically, the behind the scenes stuff that does the heavy lifting to enable rich messaging across carriers.

That’s just a guess. But nevermind that — that’s boring stuff until RCS actually gets rolling. What we’re really loving here are some of the reviews being left by users who swear this app does way more than boring background stuff:

Tyson Kemp

WOW amazing, I updated this app and my phone turned into a microwave, just then I started to get a video call on my new microwave and guess who it was, Kelly Anne Conway!!! Asking me if I liked my new microwave, and I said yes Kelly Anne, YES! But how did you know how to find me, there’s a hush pause and she whispers … PLEASE HELP … Then the call went dead. Anyway great app, only the best app!

Andrés Ramírez Quirós

So I was trapped in this car that went off the road to a lake and I couldn’t call anyone ’cause I didn’t have signal. But Google heard my plead and send me right away this update and I was able to call for help! Thanks Google for saving my life!!!

Anthony Broomall

After installing my penis miraculously grew 4 extra inches. Now that I’m a full 4.25 inches I may eat some toast. Never had toast before because I was afraid of toasters. Toasters can take over your soul, but now that I have a almost real man’s penis I’m no longer afraid

Jordan Scott Friedman

Wasn’t sure what this did until I left work the other day. Walked right outside and some giant man scooped me up and carried me all the way to my apartment. He even offered to cook me dinner! Now that’s what I call service.

You owe it to yourself to read more at Google Play.

local_offer    Google   Google Carrier Services