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Microsoft’s new anti-Google “Scroogled” store isn’t a good look for them

scroogled-gear-640x360

While we don’t have any official numbers, we don’t imagine Microsoft’s anti-Google “Scroogled” campaign has been very successful for them. But don’t tell Microsoft that. They’ve been going gung-ho with this Scroogled thing, attacking the Google Play Store over privacy concerns, even releasing an Android app not too long ago that tries to coax Android users into moving to Windows Phone.

Attempting to scare people away from the competition instead of offering a better product sounds… well, desperate. Today it looks like they’ve finally hit rock bottom. I now introduce to you, Microsoft’s new Scroogled product store. Here, anti-Google fans can share their mutual hatred of all things Google by buying Microsoft’s fear mongering propaganda merchandise.

Microsoft Scroogled merch store

You hear that? That’s the sound of empty cash registers. Sorry, Microsoft, nobody is buying what you’re selling. While we sit shaking our heads wondering if Microsoft will ever “get it,” it’s Google’s witty comeback that really gave us a chuckle. In a statement to Slate, Google said:

“Microsoft’s latest venture comes as no surprise; competition in the wearables space is really heating up.” -Google

Ha.

[Microsoft Store | via Winsource, Chromespot]




  • CGS

    HAHAHAHA. Poor Microsoft.

    I’d buy that mug ironically but I don’t Microsoft to have my money.

  • spicymeatball

    lol! They look stupid in light of all the NSA spying across all companies. Doesn’t get more trivial and foolish.

  • ArmageddonX

    Jealous much, Microsoft?

  • Cesar Ortiz

    wtf Microsoft, Why you hating on Google?

    • AbbyZFresh

      Eric Schmidt said it best a couple years back.

      “Google policy is to get right up to the creepy line and not cross it.”

      They crossed it a long time ago.

  • ChrisRhodes

    Pretty ballsy, considering Google rushed to encrypt the traffic on all their internal networks after the NSA was caught snooping, while Microsoft is busy writing in back doors to their OS.

  • Indianajonze

    that mug is somewhat hilarious. want

  • jessez93

    that “i’m watching you” shirt is awesome.

  • http://twitter.com/gamercore Chris Chavez

    Better mug idea: “Keep calm while we bring WiFi to Mongolia, high-speed internet to Uganda, Map the free world, make self-driving cars a reality, and provide the most functional mobile OS on the planet.”

    We’re going to need a bigger mug. O_o

    • Cesar Ortiz

      super size that mug.

    • iMixMasTer

      Microsoft: Desktop PC’s are overrated so we decided to listen to our users feedback and make no desktop improvements in 8.1. Also,Please by one of our surface tablets

      kthxbye

    • MK2

      Nice Jaws reference, although I suspect it was unintentional. :)

    • IHATEHIPSTERSSS

      Keep calm while we copy Apple and read your emails **

      Sad really ™

      • IHateXboxOne

        AppleIncCopiesAndroid.

        SadReally.

  • ari_free

    Shrug…I use Firefox

  • jak_341

    I may pick up the mug as a novelty piece.

    • ari_free

      Has more colors than Windows 8!

  • lycan codex

    I want that chic!

    • ari_free

      What chic?

      • lycan codex

        Love the movie man!

  • Endoverend

    This is roughly equivalent to the (defunct) KGB accusing the NSA of privacy violations. Are these concerns a serious issue? Yes. But the origin of the criticism is from a source that has the most egregious history of privacy violations in history.

    Having Microsoft be the protaganist for Google privacy issues is going to do much more harm than good, as it destroys the credibility of those who are making legitimate efforts to ensure Google plays nice here. Those legitimate efforts are now more likely to be seen as corporate shiling in the public eye.

    And never forget that this is the company that wants the world to think they own the IP rights to everything Linux can do, because they have the resources to purchase patents and then abuse the system to scare non-violating companies.

    PS…not a fan of the “Keep Calm While We Steal Your Design” mug. A bit hypocritical coming from a company that has a very ligitious history of attacking any software that uses the term Windows in its name. KCCO.

  • violator702

    The “STEP INTO OUR WEB” shirt is pretty cool. Seems like it promotes Chrome, more than it has a negative connotation.

    • squiddy20

      I think it’s playing off the line “‘Step into my web’ said the spider to the fly”. Put in that context, it does become a negative connotation. But if you don’t make that connection, it certainly does, as you say, seem like it’s promoting Chrome.

      • IHATEHIPSTERSSS

        No way we had no idea

      • ari_free

        Good. I hate flies.

  • aleaf11

    I maybe wrong but my assumption is that Microsoft is objecting to the collection of user data for Google’s own purposes. Thus allowing GOOG to “provide” ads based on which services/sites you use.

    If that in-fact is the case, I’d side with MSFT on this. I don’t need GOOG to “conveniently bundle” all of their services so that I can’t escape their prying eyes whether it be on the web (Chrome), phone (Android) or all of the other services which are essentially “forced” on a user if they want to have something as simple as Gmail synched with their phone.

    Finally, MSFT got in trouble with the US DOJ and EU for bundling services that users couldn’t get out of in the 90′s. I believe it’s just a matter of time before GOOG is hit with a similar lawsuit if they continue to pursue the practice of bundling their services.

    THE END

    • Dan

      MS was hit because they were bundling “free” components (at an unfair advantage to their competition) into an OS that they were charging money for. You can’t sue Google for bundling free components into a free OS.

      As for Google tracking your info in exchange for free services, you’re made well aware of it. If you have the extreme mental condition to think Google employees are personally looking over your data, by all means, don’t use the products they offer you at no charge.

    • Evertroy

      I don’t understand peoples problem with this practice. Is it not the same thing as when you buy things on amazon or ebay and it recomends other things you might want? Why is it bad when amazon pushes a product/service but not when google does it? When you go to a store does the salesmen not make other suggestions? When you walk down the pet aisle at the grocery store are there not a ton of displays/signs/anything else advertising…. whatever you get what im saying. Every company collects data and uses it for their own gain.

      Except Microsoft. They don’t use any of their data they collect from their consumers which is why all of their products lack any real good reason to buy them. Could also be why they are bleeding money and destroying themselves internally.

    • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

      Yes, you are wrong.

    • robbo

      Then don’t use Googles superior and free services. It’s that simple.
      But, remember when you are using msft free offerings of hmm what is their mail service called this month? Well, whatever their failed services are called, those free services also track you and monitor you to serve you ads and to sell info about you.

  • NexusKoolaid

    Maybe in response to their Scroogled campaign we should start a Microscoff campaign.

    • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

      They are doing a fine job all by themselves.

  • DavidVarghese

    Is this desperation on Microsoft’s end? Or maybe this is just someone being butt-hurt about Google’s success…

    • NexusKoolaid

      Yes.

    • AbbyZFresh

      Google’s success? Where?

      • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

        Everywhere?

  • Gabernasher

    “Keep calm while IE crashes for the 12th time today”

    • Frettfreak

      “Keep calm… til we actually come up with a product you WANT”

      • http://aidan.info.tm/ Zack Casey

        “Just wait!” – Said every Windows Phone and/or 8 fan I’ve ever talked too

      • bigshynepo

        “Keep Calm while Windows 8.1 disconnects your USB devices”

  • http://aidan.info.tm/ Zack Casey

    I think they just outdid Apple on being total jerks.

    • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

      I think idiots is the word you were looking for.

  • androidscales

    keep calm while pos windows8 crashes with BSOD

    • Keith

      I made the mistake of buying a Windows 8 computer… :( thing got a blue screen a few months after buying it.

  • Phillip Alpert

    Hahaha! I just had to look at their site. I’m stupid for expecting anything else.

  • http://www.tpapictures.com/ Phil

    Funny, this level of arrogance on Android fans’ behalf is not something that used to exist when I first became an Android user. In fact it’s the same degree of arrogance that we used to deplore in Apple back then. This Samsung infused, self absorbed, self righteous attitude of late on Android fans’ behalf is unfortunate. I thought Android users were too busy enjoying their superior phones to care what others were doing. Why does what MS’ doing matter to you? Why care at all?

    • http://aidan.info.tm/ Zack Casey

      Maybe because Google maintains Android?

    • AbbyZFresh

      Too many powerful phones and brands on Android out nowadays that do the exact same thing when it comes to basic Android functions and features. That creates tension and desperate differentiation.

    • Dan

      As a customer that still prefers ms (for laptops/desktops) I am turned off by their childish and unprofessional tactics. Whether they are targeting Google, Apple or Facebook makes little difference.

      • malcmilli

        i dont think its childish and unprofessional, i consider it just a marketing tactic, it may or may not work for you but i love gorilla advertising…. My favorite add was an Audi billboard that said “your move BMW” with a pic of their flagship car and right across the street was a BMW ad that said “checkmate” with a pick of their flagship… i LOVE that stuff.

        • Dan

          No, it would be like Audi taking a billboard out to accuse BMW of causing global warming and injuring people in car accidents.

          • malcmilli

            i’m not saying an analogy, i actually saw that ad, i’m just saying i like when companies get their hands dirty in their marketing. It’s much more interesting than the monotonous crap that many companies put out that you could practically “insert product here” types and the commercial would be just as good as if it was for any other company.

          • Dan

            Yes, I know you are saying you actually saw those. But what you saw is not analogous to what MS is doing.

            MS is not being “savvy” with “sharp thinking” in their advertisements. They are being petty, childish and quite frankly, desperate.

            Just as I have zero tolerance to listen to a politician rag on about how bad his contender is, I have equally little patience to listen to a multi-billion dollar company doing the same thing.

          • malcmilli

            I’m just saying i dont care about the specifics. I like this type of advertising. I love Google i run android, use gmail, google drive, chromecast… all of that stuff…. I’m not saying what they are doing isnt hypercritical, but i don’t care i still like the idea and these type of campaigns. A lot of people are just butt hurt because they love Google > Microsoft… or they just dont like that style of advertising. I like Google > Microsoft but i still think its funny. Difference in taste.

          • mcl630

            But in your example, Audi is comparing their car to BMW’s… fair enough. With Scroggled, Microsoft is commenting on Google’s data collection policies, without any mention of Microsoft’s (also bad, arguably worse) policies.

          • malcmilli

            I know what you’re saying,what im saying is i just dont care… i still find it funny. If Google were to turn around n do it right back i’d be like BURNNN. People called Google childish for its “blue” campaign a while back poking fun at microsoft. People called Samsung unprofessional for their ads attacking apple and “isheep.” I thought that was hilarious as well.

        • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

          No it’s totally childish and unprofessional. Especially considering they do the same damn thing.

    • danix180

      So which shirt did you buy?

      • David Gray

        BURN!

      • Cesar Ortiz

        LOL

    • David Gray

      That’s because even with all the talk against Google over the years the true believers stuck with it and now we own 80% of the market share so we KNOW we can be a little cocky now. That’s it

  • Prasad Tiruvalluri

    So does this mean that MS is out of that Phone, search and Surface business and starting this new business? Smart move.. At least they cannot rack up a $Billion loss every quarter selling T Shirts and Mugs..

    • Kevin

      They’ll just change how mugs are used. Windows Mug 8 will roll out a new feature where the mug handle will be moved to the bottom so you can squeeze more mugs in your cabinet.

  • ac

    I find it hilarious to see the different marketing gimicks that the different teams come up with. In the end, no matter what one company says about another, it’ll always come down to what’s best for each individual customer and which device suits the individual customers best. I really wish Microsoft would’ve cared MORE about mobile, back when they were trying to catch up with Apple through Windows Mobile. That’s the problem. They didn’t care until it was way too late for them to truly compete. I actually loved Windows Mobile, until my career started getting busier, Microsoft stopped caring about it, and I had less time to find ways to customize my device for my own needs. Now, their marketing team is just trying their best to win back those that already turned their back. As far as PC’s are concerned, I still prefer that over Mac, but it’s not because they bash Google or Apple…LOL.

  • CensoredByU

    How’s that YouTube app working for you MS. Keep “scroogling” and see how that works out for you.

  • scoter man1

    Keep dreaming Microsoft. You haven’t been minutely relevant since Windows 7.

    • TDN

      correction, Windows 98.

      • AS

        Nope, windows NT 3.5.1

  • steveb944

    I want to Scroo-gle that blonde.

    • real0325

      Lmao! Good one.

  • Jason Brown

    take my money microsoft! i’m going to buy 10 of each shirt and give them out as holiday gifts!

    /s

  • Frankie Abaddon

    That’s rich coming from a company that built in backdoors for the NSA.

  • TheHowiie

    Google 1 Microsoft 0

  • http://blog.sawilson.org/ Scott Wilson

    Google it with bing!

  • Yogesh

    Google must be thinking why didn’t this marketing idea come to us first :)

  • Kelvin Lloyd Aranilla

    Ironically, these could make good gifts. It’s so, so, so embarrassingly bad that it’s funny. Just don’t buy one for yourself.

  • Kloge Aage

    Ha Ha :) I think 3.9% of smartphone users think it’s funny. And 81% Android users smile – Microsoft. ;)

  • likemystory

    At least Google’s updates don’t brick devices.
    At least those using the latest Android OS builds aren’t rolling back to previous iterations out of desperation.

  • CGS

    For anyone who didn’t see it, here’s an article with Google’s response to Microsoft:

    http://www.theverge.com/2013/11/21/5131668/google-responds-to-microsoft-smear-campaign-with-witty-retort

    Gotta love Google lol

  • Itchy_Robot

    The idea if not collecting my data is actually very appealing to me. It has me actually considering a Windows or Apple phone next re-up. After all, Google is strictly an ad company, and I am hugely against adds. I’d rather pay for my products than be advertised to. I just don’t like the way Microsoft is going about spreading the message… Seems juvenile.

    • robbo

      Microsoft does the same thing. Extract info on trends to reap monetary rewards. It’s all business.

      At least with Google you get great products for the price of zero $$. It’s all about selling ads.

      And as for sharing your info privately with governments? Google fights more for your protection and is more transparent in its reporting to the public.
      Skype is owned by Microsoft and here is a discussion on backdoor they put in Skype to monitor communications. http://lists.randombit.net/pipermail/cryptography/2013-May/004228.html

    • Mirad77

      You must be very ignorant about a lot of things if you base your re-up on things like this.

    • ari_free

      No it makes you consider an open source OS like linux.

    • ichuck7

      I actually don’t mind them using some of my data. I know that’s not the popular opinion. However, if I’m going to see ads, I would much rather see ones that interest and are relevant to me.

      • dar thlaan

        That’s very true.

  • bingling_windoze

    Azure aware, Microsoft are Bingling their marketing and product execution.

  • Danny Lewis

    They’re just butt hurt over all the anti-Microsoft t-shirts from last decade.

  • rcrow490

    I love Google. I want the coffee mug.
    Seriously, for the Google enthusiast, these are great sarcasm.

    • No_Nickname90

      I want the spider shirt one. That sounds cool.

  • naduh

    fixed.

    • naduh

      or

      • No_Nickname90

        BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!! WTF!? This has made my day.

    • Michael Romero

      Much better

  • robbo

    Google happens to be a fast moving company.
    And others are threatened by that.
    Here is a simple example.
    Internet Explorer version 11 just came out.
    Chrome browser is version 30.
    Chrome browser released in 2009.
    By 2012 it surpassed Internet Explorer in usage .
    First Windows mobile phone released 2005.
    First Android phone release 2008.
    Microsoft mobile market share 3.8%
    Android 81%

    http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Usage_share_of_web_browsers

  • danix180

    My next laptop will be a Chromebook.. No offense to Microsoft .. But I simply don’t buy their strategy.

    • alfonzso

      That’s definitely stepping into our web. ;-)

  • Dan

    ridiculous…

  • Mark Mehmet

    This is why Microsoft continues to loose market share — not keeping their eye on the right ball. Competing with Google is like Kmart going after WalMart

  • MK2

    Best response ever!

  • JRomeo

    how can Microsoft use another company’s logo without copyright infringement? if i were to sell t-shirts with other company logos, i’m sure that would be copyright infringement, wouldn’t it? how can Microsoft get away with it?

    • John

      You can’t copyright a logo. It would be a trademark issue. It’s been a while since I studied trademarks in law school, but it’s not trademark infringement to use a competitor’s name and even logo in your marketing materials when you’re comparing your product to that of the competitor.

      • JRomeo

        how about blogs who use the logos or product photos of other companies? if anybody wants to start their own blog, can they just freely post logos and product photos that belong to other companies? or is this considered fair use? even though that website is making advertising money from ads on their site.

  • Bobby

    Finally Microsoft understood that they can’t even sell a T-shirt with their logo on it. :D :D

  • Mirad77

    It’s sad to see them(MS) go low like this. I just hope they don’t bring this same spirit to the new Xbox as that’s the only thing left that is actually bringing them money.
    I truly think that’s why Gates was tearing when asked about Ballmer.

    • uniquename72

      The equivalent would be making XBox commercials that do nothing but talk about how the PS4 sux.

      When a company’s advertising focuses on a different company rather than their own products, I really have to wonder if they have any faith at all in what they’re creating.

  • Chris

    I think I’ll buy a PS4 now.

  • No_Nickname90

    Hmm… I kinda like that spider shirt, though. “Step into our web”. I like that. =.P

  • ari_free

    Microsoft: We used to control the entire tech universe. Now we sell mugs.

  • samagon

    This would never have happened if Steve Jobs were still running Microsoft!

    • ichuck7

      Did you mean Steve Ballmer or were you going for obscure humor?

  • http://www.twitter.com/ninjustin ninjustin

    Microsoft is doing the same thing with Bing while giving away backdoors to their OS’s to the NSA. Come on Microsoft. That said I totally want one of those Mugs just on cheese/irony factor.

  • TCombel

    I would buy some of the gear if Google made it and included Andy.

  • alfonzso

    I like the merch. Everyone is doing it though, not only Google. They should replace the Chrome logo with a logo mash of NSA, Google, Microsoft, Yahoo, Amazon, etc.

  • Xanderalmighty

    Microsoft being the kanye west of the tech world

  • https://plus.google.com/u/0/111851513173390877071/about Chris Hubbell

    I love Google’s Response! It’s classy and snarky everything the internet loves.

  • spicymeatball

    I love how this from first glance looks like Chrome advertisements. First shirt=Nice detective guy looking over me. 2nd shirt = Google helps me stay calm. 3rd Shirt says welcome to Googles amazing ecosystem. The old adage that any publicity is good publicity must have been overlooked by microsoft marketing and public relations group.

  • Anderson Casotti

    and probally Microsoft will make more money of the sale of this items than from windows phone.

    • androidscales

      no one wants pos windoze phones or pos surface tablets ms needs new ventures like making t-shirts and mugs. ms stopped innovating after widows 11 and dos that they copied from IBM, apple and now android. ms has been a pathetic slum dog of tech companies. ms without monopoly of desktop keeping hostage of OEMS like Dells and HP/compaq wouldn’t have survived

    • DannyB2

      Maybe Microsoft can give away a Windows Phone or Surface Tablet with each t-shirt?

  • Brakkus

    microsoft did the same thing for the xbox one so this marketing campaign is also stupid.however i will be getting a nokia lumia because most android/ios phones have awful cameras and stupid apps.im certain windows phone will also have stupid apps as well.

    • Robert Lott

      You should get a nexus 5. The nexus series doesn’t typically come with much/any bloatware.

      • Brakkus

        I’m fine with removing bloatware manually.
        xbox one is a fail for microsoft.
        youtube is google’s fault.
        vaio is sony’s fault etc lol

  • Jason

    Turnabout…

  • master94

    Free advertisement for chrome. Thanks MS

  • dar thlaan

    Microsoft gathers and gives away your info too. Interesting that they point the finger when everyone knows this.
    Anyone who says “it’s not really scary” are not looking into the future, or the news. You have people being arrested when undercover police offer them a cigarette outside of a business door. Seriously, a tobacco ordinance sting???
    Since prison is a big business in America, they want those prisons full. And if they start losing inmates, they will find new ways to re-stock. Being able to find people, and target people, is a very useful tool in that respect. And with all the information we’re all feeding them, they will have the perfect psychological profile on anyone they choose. In fact I would gladly bet every penny I have, that they already have a very sophisticated program that can give pinpoint psych profiles on anyone, just given their buying habits and web history, let alone all of the personal information posted daily to Facebook and all the other terribly important “social media” sites.
    Yes, it IS something to be scared of. That said, I still greatly enjoy all the benefits of being connected. Too bad everyone will be sorry for it sometime in the future.

  • John

    More like M$, right guys?

    ….I’ll see myself out.

    • TickedOffNorthEnder

      no kidding. This kind of anti-advertising turns me off.